Guy Walks Into A Bar Jokes

A guy walks into a bar owned by Eminem He tells the bartender,"Give me 2 shots of..."

The bartender cuts him off saying,"You only get 1 shot."

Guy walks into a bar and orders a fruit punch. Bartender says, "Pal, if you want a punch you'll have to stand in line"

Guy looks around, but there is no punch line.

A guy walks into a bar owned by Eminem... He says,"Give me 2 shots..."

The bartender cuts him off saying,"You only get one shot."

A guy walks into a bar and orders a punch The bartender says “Sir, if you wanna punch, you gotta get in line.”
The guy looks around but there is no punch line

A guy walks into a bar owned by Eminem... He says,"Give me 2 shots..."

The bartender cuts him off and says,"You only get 1 shot."

A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot... The bartender says, "Wow! That is really cool! Where did you get it?"

"Africa", says the parrot.

A guy walks into a bar and orders fruit punch The bartender says, "Pal, If you want punch, you'll have to go stand in line."

The guys looks around, but there is no punch line.

Guy walks into a bar and orders a fruit punch Bartender says
“Man if you want punch you have to stand in line.” Guy looks around but there is no punchline

A guy walks into a bar and sees a girl Guy: You're the most average girl here

Girl: You're so mean

Guy: No, you are

So a Black guy walks into a bar with a beautiful parrot on his shoulder... The bartender says "Wow, that's something real special you've got there! Where'd you get it?"

"Africa!", says the parrot.

A black guy walks into a bar with a huge parrot on his shoulder. Barman says “Oh wow I’ve never seen one like that before, where did you get him from?”

Parrot says “Africa, there’s loads of them over there”

A tall guy walks into a bar that's what he gets for being tall

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "Did you know that geese kill more humans than sharks each year?" the guy asks the bartender. "Yes, but let's be fair about it," the bartender replies. "It's really hard for a goose to kill a shark."

A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder.. The bartender looks at him and says, "Wow, that's pretty cool! Where'd you get it?"

The parrot replies, "In Africa, they're everywhere!"

Guy walks into a bar and orders a fruit punch Bartender says "Dude, if you want a punch you'll have to stand in line."

Guy looks around, but there is no punch line.

Guy walks into a bar Guy walks into a bar and orders a fruit punch.
Bartender says "Pal, if you want a punch you'll have to stand in line"
Guy looks around, but there is no punch line.

A deaf guy walks into a bar... A deaf guy walks into a bar.

Bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here."

Deaf guy says, "I'll have a beer."

A guy walks into a bar and says, "I'm going to shoot whoever slept with my wife"! A man shouts from the back, "You don't got enough bullets, bud"!

A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks him, "Where did you get that thing?"

Parrot says, "Africa."

Guy walks into a bar and orders a whiskey-coke. Bartender asks if Pepsi is okay and guy says that's fine.

Bartender turns around to make the drink and when finished presents the drink and says "here's your pepsi-coke."

A guy walks into a bar with a gun and yelled "Who slept with my wife?" and in the background someone replied "You ain't got enough bullets."

A guy walks into a bar owned by Eminem He says "give me 2 shots of-"

The bartender cuts him off and says "you only get one shot"

A roman guy walks into a bar, lifts two fingers and says: "I'll take five beers"

A guy walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants... And the bartender asks "what's wrong?"

The man replied "I don't know, but it's driving me nuts!"

A guy walks into a bar with a pair of jumper cables The bartender says “look, I’m gonna serve you, but you better not try to start anything “

A guy walks into a Bar And asks for a beer.


The bartender: 'do you want a normal beer or a no-alcohol?'


'It depends. Do you want normal money or Monopoly's?'

A guy walks into a bar owned by Eminem He tells the bartender “I’ll have 2 shots of...”

The bartender cuts him off, “you only get 1 shot.”

A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder... and the bartender says: "hey where'd you get that? It looks exotic." And the parrot says: "Africa."

A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder The bartender says, "Hey, that thing is cool - where did you get it?"

The parrot replies, "Africa."

A guy walks into a bar... his face gets bruised, his phone shatters on the concrete, and the Pokemon gets away.

So a guy walks into a bar where Eminem is the bartender Guy: Two shots please

Eminem: You only get one shot

So a black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder the bartender says “Wow that’s cool! Where’d you get it” “Africa” says the parrot

A guy walks into a bar and orders a fruit punch. The bartender says " if you want to get a fruit punch then you have to wait in line" But there was no punch line

A guy walks into a bar... ...with a slab of asphalt under his arm. He says to the bartender "I'll take a drink, and one for the road."

A guy walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt in his hand. He puts the asphalt on the chair next him and says to the bartender: “One beer for me and one for the road.”

Two guys are walking down the sidewalk, one guy walks into a bar... The other guy ducks.

A black guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink.
Bartender: I like your accent, where are you from?
Guy: I'm Liberian!
Bartender:

^^^*Oh* ^^^*sorry.* ^^^*I* ^^^*like* ^^^*your* ^^^*accent* ^^^*where* ^^^*are* ^^^*you* ^^^*from?*

A guy walks into a bar... A guy walks into a bar with a handful of fresh dog manure and says to the bartender, "Look what I almost stepped in."

(from Garrison Keillor)

Guy walks into a bar with a unholsteret gun Entering he waves it in the air shouting
"This is a 8 round loaded 1911, now tell me who slept with my wife!"

Shortly after you hear a yelling from the background.

"YOU NEED MORE AMMO!"