Hilarious Ireland Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Ireland Jokes

Which country has the fastest growing capitol? Ireland. It's Dublin every year.

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Did you know that Iceland... ...is only one sea away from Ireland?

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Two fat ladies walk into a bar They order drinks, in a thick accent.

"You two ladies from Ireland?" asks the bartender.

Offended, one of them replies "Wales!"

"Oh I'm so sorry," says the bartender, "Are you two whales from Ireland?"

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Why does Ireland have the fastest growing economy in the world? Because its capital is Dublin all the time!

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What do you call sunscreen in Ireland? Pubs

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What did Saint Patrick say when he drove all the snakes out of Ireland? "Everyone got seat belts on back there?"

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What country's Capital has the fastest growing population in the world? Ireland. Everyday it's Dublin.

Score: 270

When it gets cold in Ireland, we all sit round a candle. And when it gets REALLY cold, we light it.

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Which country has the fastest growing capital? Ireland. It's Dublin every year.

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A man waved at me, so I waved him back but apparently he was waving at a woman behind me, so I kept my hand up and stopped a taxi that took me to the airport. I am now in Ireland starting a new life

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Have you ever noticed that Ireland is just one sea away from.... Iceland

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A man was drinking in a British pub ...when he noticed two very large women with strong accents. "Hey, are you two ladies from Ireland?" he asked.

"It's Wales, you idiot" one answered.

"I'm sorry" the man replied. "Are you two whales from Ireland?"

Score: 101

Which country’s capital is the fastest growing? Ireland’s.

Every year it’s Dublin.

Score: 83

I love summer here in Ireland It's my favorite day of the year.

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Ireland's population is out of control It keeps Dublin and Dublin

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I can't find a single Ekans here in Ireland with Pokemon Go. Thanks, St Patrick

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Have you noticed That Ireland is one sea away from Iceland?

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Did you hear about the country with the fastest growing capital? It's Ireland - every day it's Dublin.

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Ireland is the fastest growing country Their population is Dublin every day.

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I approach two fat ladies in england, asking them a question "Excuse me, are you two ladies from Ireland?"

"It's Wales, you idiot!"

"Oh, I'm so sorry. Are you two whales from Ireland?"

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Why is Ireland so rich? Because their capital is always Dublin.

Score: 37

What country's capital has the fastest growing population. Ireland, its Dublin everyday.

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U2 are one of Ireland's most successful bands. Or according to their tax returns, one of Netherlands' least successful hardware store owners.

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The capital of Ireland is the world's fastest growing city.. It's Dublin every year.

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What country’s capital is the fastest growing? Ireland’s Every year it’s Dublin

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2 Big Old Gals Were Sitting In A Bar A man heard them talking and noticed a foreign accent. He asked "are you ladies from Ireland?"

"WALES!!" they both replied

"Oh I'm so sorry!.... Are you two Whales from Ireland???"

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Which country’s capital is the fastest growing? Ireland.

Every year its dublin.

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Which country's capital is the fastest growing? Ireland's. It's Dublin every year.

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Which country’s capital is the fastest growing? Answer: Ireland’s.
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Every year it’s Dublin.

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Which country's capital has the fastest population growth? Ireland, because it's always Dublin.

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Did you know that Iceland... ...is only one sea away from Ireland…

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Have you ever noticed... Ireland is one "sea" from Iceland?

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Breaking news: A helicopter has crash landed into a cemetery in Ireland The pilots didn't survive, and so far local police have recovered 956 bodies.

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The pope blessed the people of Ireland today. So don’t pick a fight with an Irishman. For a short time, all their attacks do maximum damage.

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I love summer in Ireland The rain gets warmer.

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If I bring potatoes in my luggage to Ireland Is that smuggling or reparations?

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An Irishman walks into a bar An Irishman walks into a bar. The bartender says: "Where you from?"

Irishman replies: "Dublin, Ireland."

Bartender: "Oh, really?"

Irishman: "No, O'Reilly"

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The population of Ireland is growing faster than any other country in the world It's capital has been Dublin every year

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Why do Scotsmen wear kilts? Sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

To be fair though, the ones in Ireland are all deaf.

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New Ireland Jokes

How are fake diamonds related to Ireland? They’re sham rocks.

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I once got to second base in Ireland I'd have gone farther, but it turns out the Blarney Stone has some pretty good security

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A man from Ireland got into a terrible car crash and his eye was dislodged from his socket. Miraculously the surgeons were able to place it back in and he had no lost of vision. Guess you could say he had "the luck of the Iris"

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Which country in the world has the largest capital It's Ireland, because it's capital is always 'Dublin'

(My PE teachers son came up with this one)

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in the U.S there are 50 states, and in Ireland, they only have one state Intoxication

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What's the angriest country in the world? Ireland.

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The mile-high club is different in Ireland. It's all about air lingus. The woman gets lucky and the man gets charmed.

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Its weird how Ireland is just one sea away from Iceland

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All snakes wishing to remain in Ireland, please raise your right hands.

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Irish Nessie Over in Ireland, in a lake near Dublin, thay have their own Nessie.

It's a monster that likes to ring doorbells.

It's a knock-less monster.

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What's the difference between Ireland and America? When we say waterboarding in Ireland it means surfing.

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I hear Ireland's the richest country in the world... Its capital is always Dublin.

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