Janitor Jokes

How warm is a janitor's closet? Broom Temperature.

Today I saved a man drowning in the river I tossed him a bar of soap and he washed ashore

Source: University Daytime Janitor

The janitor in my apartment complex asked me if I wanted to smoke some weed with her. I said no. I can't deal with a high maintenance woman.

What Did the Janitor Say When He Jumped Out of the Closet? "Supplies!"


I'll see myself out

The janitor of my apartment building asked if I wanted to smoke some weed with her I told her no. I can't stand high maintenance women.

The female janitor at my building asked if I would chill and smoke some weed with her I said no thanks, I can't handle high maintenance women

The janitor lady in our apartment building wanted me to hang out with her and smoke pot. I said no. I tend to avoid high maintenance women.

A janitor, a waitress, and a bartender walk into a bar. Then they open for the day.

What did the janitor say when he jumped out the closet? Supplies!

The gym teacher gets a handgun, the janitor gets a shot gun, and the principal gets an uzi. What do they arm the lunch lady with? A salt rifle

Why was the janitor late? He overswept

A janitor, a security guard, and a CEO are sitting at table with a dozen Twinkies. The CEO grabs 11 Twinkies for himself, turns to the security guard and says: "Watch out for the janitor, he wants part of your Twinkie."

What did the Asian janitor say when he jumped out of the broom closet? SUPPLIES!!!

Why did the janitor get fired from the bank? Because he cleaned out the vault.

What did the janitor say when he came out of the closet? SUPPLIES!

What does the janitor say when he jumps out of the closet? SUPPLIES!!!

I just swept a girl off her feet. I'm quite an aggressive janitor.

The janitor couldn't remember where he put the floor polisher As a programmer, this isn't the first time I encountered a 'buffer allocation failure due to memory error'

A men calls the hotel reception He tells the manager, "I need help, my ex-wife is trying to jump out of the window", the manager replies "Do you want me to send a psychologist?", the men says "No, send the janitor, the window is stuck!"

What did the janitor shout when he came out of the closet? Supplies!

have you heard about the janitor that died? yeah, he kicked the bucket

What does a janitor say when he jumps out of the closet? “SUPPLIES!”

What does a janitor yell when he jumps out of the closet? Supplies!

Harvard University accepted my application! I'm going to be their best janitor!

What did the janitor say when jumped out of the closet? Supplies!

Did you hear about the janitor who suffocated in a row of turds? He died in the line of doody.

How does the ghost of a janitor communicate with the living world? Squeegee board

What do you call a janitor in space? A vacuum cleaner

What did the janitor say when he jumped out of his closet? Supplies

The School Janitor Janitor: I know im just a school janitor, but my eldest son is in M.I.T., his younger brother in Princeton, and my youngest in Harvard.

Student: (amazed) Wow, what are they studying?

Janitor: Oh no, they are janitors as well.

When a girl sleeps with girls in college, she's "experimenting" When I do it, I'm "fired" and "a terrible dorm janitor"

Why did the janitor file for a divorce? He found his wife sweeping with someone else.

The janitor at the bank managed to rob 21 million dollars. He made a clean getaway!

Why did the janitor with a speech impediment miss his shift? He overswept

A caveman walks into an auditorium He sits down in the front row and a janitor walks by. The janitor turns to the caveman and says, "Hey, the anthropology lecture doesn't start for another hour. You're early, man."

What does a janitor yell when he jumps out to scare someone? Supplies!

A woman walks in on the janitor using the women's washroom... "What are you doing in here?"

"The men's room is filthy"

What do you call a janitor who smokes weed? High maintenance.

*Janitor puts on rubber gloves* Security Guard 1: "Where you going, Michael Jackson?"

Janitor: "Today's prostates! Prostates check-up!"

Security Guard 2: "He already did mine. Did mine at 7:30 this morning."

Security Guard 1: "No wonder you were in a good mood!"