Light Bulb Jokes

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Funniest Light Bulb Jokes

Funny Light Bulb Jokes
Score: 11312

How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, and the other to give it an unexpected twist at the end.

Score: 7437

How many D&D players does it take to change a light bulb? All of them. Never split the party.

Score: 7057

How many Germans do you need to change a light bulb? One. Because we are efficient and not very funny.

Score: 3265

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? One. We are efficient and dont have humour.




Edit: Wow this blew up. As a German, I didnt expect this.

Score: 2685

How many super saiyans does it take to change a light bulb? Find out next time, on Dragon Ball Z!

Score: 2487

How many divorced men does it take to change a light bulb? No one knows. They never get to keep the house.

Edit: Thanks for all the awesome comments. I can't keep up!

Score: 1749

How many germans does it take to change a light bulb? One, they're efficient and not very funny.

Score: 1119

How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb? Apparently not three. It's still dark in my basement.

Score: 984

How many dance teachers does it take to change a light bulb? 5678

Score: 970

How many Germans do you need to change a light bulb? One. They are efficient but not funny.

Score: 931

How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb? Just kidding, you can't change anything in the United States.

Score: 889

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? One, because they are efficient and have no sense of humor.

Score: 762

How many Congressmen does it take to change a light bulb? Better buy a flashlight

Score: 633

How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously not 8, my basement is still dark.

Score: 608

How many divorced men does it take to change a light bulb? Who cares? They never get the house anyway.

Score: 434

How many Black Lives Matters protesters does it take to change a light bulb? Don't be silly, Black Lives Matters protesters can't change anything.

Score: 420

How many Vietnam vets does it take to change a light bulb? YOU DON'T KNOW!!! YOU WEREN'T THERE!!!!

Score: 305

How many Psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. But the light bulb has to want to change.

Score: 301

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None. Feminists don't change anything.

Score: 294

How many bros does it take to change a light bulb? None. They prefer Natural Light.

Score: 247

How many IT people does it take to change a light bulb? Do you have a ticket for that?

Score: 236

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question, feminists can't change anything.

Score: 230

How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb? One, or two? Three, or four?

Score: 202

How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb? I don't know yet. My Basement is still dark.

Score: 186

How many cancer patients does it take to change a light bulb? 1 and 12 people to say how inspiring it was

Score: 161

How many graphic designers does it take to change a light bulb? Does it have to be a light bulb? 'Cause I had this other idea...

Score: 160

How many divorced men does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question. No one knows, they never get the house.

Score: 158

How many people with OCD does it take to change a light bulb? Seven. It *has* to be seven.

Score: 155

How many professors does it take to change a light bulb? None. Thats what grad students are for

Score: 155

How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb in my basement? Apparently not seven because it's still dark down there.

Score: 122

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? **One**

Germans are efficient & have no humor.

Score: 67

How many anime characters does it take to change a light bulb? Find out next time on Dragon Ball Z.

Score: 60

How many country singers does it take to change a light bulb? Two; one to change the lightbulb and one to write a song about how good the old one was.

Score: 55

How many women does it take to change a light bulb? Definitely more than 6, because my basement is still dark

Score: 48

How many Super Saiyans does it take to change a light bulb? One. But it takes 10 episodes to do it.

Score: 47

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? One, they just hold the bulb and wait for the world to revolve around them.

Score: 45

How many Apples does it take to change a light bulb? Two

One to change the bulb

The other to sell the iBulb for $600 and claim it's "revolutionary"

Score: 44

How many super saiyans does it take to change a light bulb? only one but it takes him 5 episodes.

Score: 37

How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one.

But it takes a very long time, and the light bulb has to really want to change.

Score: 30

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New Light Bulb Jokes

how many dnd players does it take to change a light bulb All of them, never split the party

Score: 8

What do feminists change with a light bulb? Trick question feminists can't change anything

Score: 2

How many Alabama football players does it take to change a light bulb? The entire team, and they all get a semester's credit for it.

Score: 9

How much protestor does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question, they don’t change anything

Score: 5

How many procrastinators does it take to change a light bulb? Ehh, I'll tell you tomorrow.

Score: 3

Just went to the store and bought a pack of energy saving light bulbs... As the woman scanned them, she asked, "Will you be putting these up yourself, sir?"

"'Erm, no." I replied. "What kind of sicko do you think I am?"

Score: 30

How many psychiatrist does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change.

Score: 3

My daughter packed a light bulb in her lunch box this morning. I asked her, "why did you put that in there?"

She replied, "I want a light snack."

Score: 11

A battery and a light bulb were in a race. Who won? None of them:
The light bulb was blown away from the short circuit and the battery gave up because it couldn't resist it either.

Score: 3

How many religious people does it take to change a light bulb? Nun

Score: 2

How many south Americans does it take to build a light bulb? A Brazilian

Score: 2

How many old people does it take to change a light bulb? None...they don't like change

Score: 7

How many homeless people does it take to change a light bulb? Only 1. It’s not that difficult of a task.

Score: 2

How many sacred holy sisters does it take to change a light bulb? nun

Score: 2

How many South Americans does it take to change a light bulb? A Brazillian.

Score: 3

How many moths does it take to change a light bulb? I don't know but they keep trying anyway.

Score: 18

How many Emo's does it take to change a light bulb? None.

They just sit in the dark and cry about it.

Score: 2

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

Score: 13

How many tech support reps does it take to change a light bulb? I'm sorry, this isn't the right department to give you the answer to that question. Let me transfer you to another sub, hold please....

Score: 21

How many drunks does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to swig till the room starts to spin.

Score: 5

What did the corn chip say to the light bulb? Are you turned on? Because I'm Frito Lay

Score: 5

How many Palestinians does it take to change a light bulb? None! They sit in the dark forever and blame the Jews for it!

Score: 14

How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb? At least three so far...

Score: 3

How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb None. The place looks better in the dark.

Score: 3

How many grad students does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to make the change, but 3 will claim co-authorship.

Score: 7

It took years for Thomas Edison to perfect the light bulb... But that's because he was working in the dark.

Score: 14

How many optometrists are needed to change a light bulb? is it 1, or 2?

1……
or 2?

Score: 3

How many dyslexic people does it take to change a light bulb? Steven.

Score: 17

How do cops change a light bulb? They beat the room for being black.

Score: 4

How many atheists does it take to change a light bulb? One. The atheist actually changes the light bulb, rather than praying that it will be done.

Score: 19

How many dyslexics does it take to change a light bulb? Steven.

Score: 2

How many saiyans does it take to change a light bulb? Just one but it takes 10 episodes to do it

Score: 21

How many opticians does it take to change a light bulb? Is it one or two?! One... or two?!

Score: 17

How many Keynesian economists does it takes to change a light bulb? All of them. Because that will generate employment and therefore more consumption, shifting the aggregate demand to the right.

Score: 2

How many "suh dudes" does it take to fix a light bulb? None, its lit fam.

Score: 3

How many police officers does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just start shooting the room because it's black.

Score: 19

Why do light bulbs burn out with frequency? Because it hertz.

Score: 2

How many light bulbs does North Korea Have? One.
What's it called?
The Sun.

Score: 3

How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? Why change a light bulb when sitting in the dark is so cool?

Score: 2

How many ophthalmologists does it take to change a light bulb? 1... or 2? 1... or 2?

Score: 5

Why is Donald Trump good at changing light bulbs? Because mini hands make light work.

Score: 2

The light bulb wanted to be a mathematician But he was too dim

Score: 4

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? Zero. It was engineered properly the first time and does not require changing.

Score: 4

They changed the power of my favourite light bulbs And they're just not watt they used to be

Score: 7

Idiots and light bulbs How many Idiots does it take to change a lightbulb?

When is the last time you tried

Score: 2

How many white knights does it take to change a light bulb? Don't you worry your pretty, little head about it, the men will take care of it.

Score: 4

How many wife- beaters does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. So how come I gotta do everything around here?

(I don't actually condone domestic violence)

Score: 2

How many sexists does it take to change a light bulb? None, let her cook in the dark.

Score: 14

How many Call Of Duty players does it take to change a light bulb? Both of them.

Score: 13

How many Scottish highlanders does it take to change a light bulb? There can be only one.

Score: 3

How many blind people does it take to change a light bulb? None if nobody's looking.

Score: 2

How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but it’s expensive and takes a really long time.

Score: 4

How many suh dudes does it take to fix a light bulb? It's already lit fam

Score: 3

How Many Karma Whores does it take to change a light bulb? If this gets 500 upvotes i'll tell you!

Score: 12

How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb? One..... Or two...

Score: 6

How many africans does it take to change a light bulb? "None, because they don't have electricity"

Score: 2

How many Asian-American actors does it take to change a light bulb? None - because they would all be replaced by white actors.

Score: 5

How many dead memes does it take to change a light bulb? Over 9000.

Score: 6

How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb should be willing to change.

Score: 14

How many Ferguson police does it take to change a light bulb? None, they'll just shoot the room for being black.

Score: 5

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