Melon Jokes

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Funniest Melon Jokes

What do you get when you mix a broccoli and a melon? The saddest vegetable known to man: a melonccoli.

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Funny Melon Jokes
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3 hookers are chatting in a bar The first says "I've worked it so much I can fit a squash up there." The second says "that's nothing, I can stick a melon up mine." The third just smiles and slowly slides down the bar stool.

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I tried marrying a melon... But apparently we cantaloupe

Edit: it was very difficult because she kept saying "honey dew me"

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What did the melon tell her boyfriend when he proposed? Yes but we cantaloupe.

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What do you call a melon that can't marry abroad? A cantaloupe.

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Why was the fruit/vegetable hybrid upset? He was a melon-cauliflower.

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What do you call a pessimistic melon? A cantaloupe

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Two melons have a secret love affair... One melon says to the other, "baby, I love you so much. I just wanna sneak away and get married right now."

The other responds, "no, we cantaloupe."

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I tried convincing my melon-loving girlfriend to run away with me. But she told me she Cantaloupe.

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What did the one melon say to the other melon? We're too young to marry. We cantaloupe.

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What do you call a Mexican melon? A cantelopez!


Came up with this on all by myself. I'm a new Dad, so I feel as if I've significantly leveled up my Dad Joke ability.

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What did the melon say when her boyfriend proposed? Yes, but we cantaloupe.

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Why should you never marry a melon? Because they cantaloupe

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One melon asks another melon to marry it. The other melon said- "Sorry I cantaloupe."

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Why did the melon have a shotgun wedding? Because she can’t elope.

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What do you call a sad dog that likes to eat fruit? A melon-collie.

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What do you get if you mix Lassie and a canteloupe? Melon-Collie.

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What do you call a melon that will never marry? Cantaloupe!

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Why didn’t melon run away to get married? Because It cantaloupe.

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My girlfriend of six years is a melon. She broke my heart when I proposed to her today. She said, “I just cantaloupe with you.”

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A melon went to ask his girlfriends parents if he could marry her The mother replied, "sure but you cant elope"

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What do you call a group of sad melons? A melon-colony.

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Two melons are sitting in a field and the first one turns to the second and says "We've been together all this time we should run away and get married."

The second melon replies, "We cantaloupe, we're melons!"

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What did the runaway melon say to the honeydew on Valentine's Day? I cantaloupe.

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Why did the melon leave her boyfriend? He said he can't elope.

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What do you call a rich vegetarian? A melon baller.

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What did the melon say to the lemon’s marriage proposal? I cantaloupe

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Why does Lassie eat cantaloupe when she's sad? She's melon collie.

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Why is the quarantined melon couple sad? Because they cantaloupe :(

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Why did the couple bring a melon to their honeymoon? Because they cantaloupe...

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Why did the melon have to ask permission before getting married? Because he cantaloupe.

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My wife fave birth to our daughter yesterday. She was born with jaundice So there she was - small round and yellow. We called her *melon*-y

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Why can’t a melon get married? They can’t elope.

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How do you grow a melon? Watermelon

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Did you know that watermelon is only 50% water? The other 50% is melon

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What kind of summer camp would a toilet, a mountain lion, and a cantaloupe all go to? A John Cougar Melon Camp

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What do you call a melon that won't get married? A cantaloupe!

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What melon will be lonely all its life? The cantaloupe 😂

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What do you call a melon in the ocean? Watermelon.

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New Melon Jokes

Why will Romeo Melon and Juliet Melon commit suicide? They cantaloupe.

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You would never guess which fruit is contributing the most to human space travel Melon Musk

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What did the older melon say to the two young melons, who's love was forbidden? You cantaloupe.

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Why couldn't the melon get married? Because it cantaloupe.

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Why was the dog that looked like a canteloupe sad? She was a Melon-Collie

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Why did the fruit theatre company not pick the melon to star in Romeo and Juliette? Because it cantaloupe

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What do you call a melon that can't get married? Cantaloupe

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Two ants are at a picnic... Two ants are at a picnic, sitting on a bowl of melon.

One ant says to the other "let's get married and run away together!"

The other ant says "cantaloupe."

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Why couldn't the two melon get married? Because they cantaloupe

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What did the lady melon say when her boyfriend proposed to her? Honeydew! But we Cantaloupe!

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Why does a white person turn black after eating a whole cantaloupe? Because he's got a lot of melon-in.

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A melon's boyfriend asks her dad's permission to marry her. Her dad rejects him, but the boy proposes anyway. "Babe" he says, "Your father doesn't approve, but we can run away together." "The melon, in tears, replies "I'm so sorry honey, but I can't-elope!"

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A melon's boyfriend asks her dad's permission to marry her. The dad rejects him, but the boy proposes anyway.

"Babe" he says, "Your father doesn't approve, but we can run away together."

"The melon, in tears, replies "I'm so sorry, but I can't-elope!"

Score: 2

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