Sherlock Jokes

Why are Sherlock Holmes' taxes so low? He's a master of deduction.

Sherlock Holmes Sherlock Holmes is inspecting a bed. He says to Watson, "this bed is missing something." Watson replies "no sheet sherlock."

Tell me, Sherlock, where do lemons come from? A lemon tree, dear Watson.

Dr. Watson was again impressed by Sherlock Holmes’ diverse set of skills, as Watson asked inquisitively as to what tree Sherlock was planting... To which Sherlock replied, “Why, that’s a lemon tree, my dear Watson.”

Sherlock's son tugs at his robe, screaming: "Daaad, dad!" Sherlock looks at him and says: "Watson?"

What do you call when you cross a detective with an electrician Sherlock Ohms

(sorry if this is repost, I thought of it in class)

Sherlock was gardening when Watson came over and asked what he was planting. "A lemon tree, Watson".

Why doesn't Sherlock Holmes pay any income tax? Because he makes so many brilliant deductions.

What's Sherlock's favourite type of rock? Sedimentary my dear Watson...

Just wrote this How does Sherlock Holmes find out what TV shows are on?

He just asks Watson.

(Works better out loud)

Why doesn't sherlock holmes ever drink tea made in hospitals? He really hates more ER tea

What does Sherlock call his friends? His Holmies

Sherlock had a lemon, and Watson asked him where it came from. Sherlock said... A lemon tree, my dear Watson.

What do you call Watson when Sherlock isn’t around? Holmeless

Sherlock and Watson go to shoot up a school.. Watson: which part of the school shall we head to first sherlock?
Sherlock: Elementary my dear Watson.
[Please don't kill me for this]

Watson: Sherlock, what kind of rock do you think this is? Sherlock: Sedimentary, my dear Watson

Tesla, Oscar Wilde, and Sherlock Holmes walk into a bar. The punchline of this joke was patented and then hidden by Thomas Edison.

Sherlock was convicted for child molestation A disgusted Watson visited him in prison, and said, "I cannot believe you were caught exposing yourself to a child in high school!"

"Elementary, my dear Watson..."

I wonder if Sherlock Holmes is good at his taxes... He's great at making deductions.

Watson didn't make much money working for Sherlock Holmes Too many deductions

Ordered a Sherlock Holmes game online... Received a podiatric prosthesis instead...

Must unravel this strange mystery.

The game is afoot.

How does Sherlock Holmes use the bathroom? By process of elimination.

The Detective Who was the first electricity detective?

Sherlock Ohms

Sherlock was working on his garden, when Watson walked over and asked what he was planting. "What are you planting?" said Watson.

"It's a lemon tree, my dear Watson."

What do you call a detective in the real estate business? Sherlock Homes

Why did Sherlock Holmes visit a Mexican restaurant? Because he was looking for a good case idea.

When looking at rocks, what does Sherlock say? It’s Sedimentary my dear Watson.

What does Sherlock Holmes do in the toilet? He de-deuces.

Dr Watson asks Sherlock Holmes... "Holmes, why are you spreading fruit juice on my buttocks?"

"Lemon entry dear Watson, Lemon entry"

A detective walks into a party... and asks the partygoers,
"Do you guys have any Nacho Cheese?"
The partygoers respond,
"No dip, Sherlock."

Sherlock Holmes and Watson are out hunting some rocks Sherlock picks up a rock, admiring it. Watson asks, "What kind of rock is that? Igneous?"

Sherlock replies, "Sedimentary, my dear Watson. Sedimentary."

What did Watson say when he and Holmes got stranded on a desert island? "No ship Sherlock"

One night at dinner, Watson watches Sherlock unhinge his jaw and eat a line of sausages nearing six feet. Amazed, Watson asked, "How did you do that??" Sherlock replied, "Alimentary, my dear Watson".

Watson to Sherlock,What kind of rock is that Sherlock? It's sedimentary my dear Watson.

Sherlock Holmes got audited by the IRS. He had too many deductions.

Sherlock Holmes turned to Dr Watson and announced: "The murderer lives in the house with the yellow door." "Good grief, Holmes," said Watson. "How on earth did you deduce that?"

"It's a lemon entry, my dear Watson."

Sherlock joke (my first post here) Patient: \**dying of cancer*\* No chance for you to be a doctor this time, Mr Homes!

Doctor: Oh, do your research. I'm not a hero, I'm a high functioning homeopath. Merry Christmas! \**cuts off morphine supply\**

Sherlock walks into a grade 3 classroom. It’s Elementary my dear Watson.

What do you call your friend thats a detective? Your Sherlock Homie