Hilarious Sugar Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Sugar Jokes

TIL "sugar" is the only word in the English language where "su-" makes a "sh" sound. At least, I'm pretty sure...it's correct

Score: 6910

Score: 2340

I hope they serve cookies at the Royal Wedding this weekend Just to show how a touch of brown sugar makes a ginger snap.

Score: 1026

American man to wife: "pass the honey... Honey" Welsh man to wife: "pass the sugar... Sugar"

Scottish man to wife: "pass the milk... ya cow"

Score: 274

Cute names to call your girlfriend with 1.sugar

2.honey

3.flour

4.egg

5.1/2 lb butter

6.stir

7.pour into pan

8.preheat to 375°

Score: 238

What is the gender-neutral term for "sugar daddy?" Glucose guardian.

Score: 208

What do you call a sugar daddy with HIV? Financial AIDS

Score: 177

If life gives you lemons... I hope ~~he~~ life also gives you water and sugar or else your lemonade's gonna suck.

EDIT: Made sure life's gender was no longer assumed.

Score: 124

TIL "Sugar" is the only "su"-word in the english language that makes the "sh"-sound! (I haven't actually fact-checked this one, but I'm pretty sure it's correct)

Score: 103

I can eat sugar with either hand... I'm ambidextrose!

Score: 86

What's the difference between LSD and LDS (Latter Day Saints)? one you take with a sugar cube, the other with a grain of salt :P

Score: 41

Sugar is the only word in English language in which "Su" is pronounced as "Shu". I am pretty sure about it.

Score: 37

Cute things to call your girlfriend: 1. Sugar
2. Honey
3. Flour
4. Egg
5. 1/2lb butter
6. Stir
7. Pour into pan
8. Preheat to 375°

Score: 34

If I have sugar in my left hand and sugar in my right hand am I ambidextrose ?

Score: 29

I want to treat the roads with sugar instead of salt This way, you know... Everyone can have a sweet ride

Score: 29

The gender neutral term for sugar daddy is Glucose Guardian.

Score: 28

Did you know sugar is the only word that begins with an 's' that makes a 'sh' sound? I'm sure of it.

Score: 24

I got arrested the other day after police found me covering a boy with melted sugar I was charged with child molassation

Score: 24

Human-beings get rich as they grow old: Silver in Hair;
Gold in Teeth;
Sugar in Blood;
Precious Stones in Kidney;
And a never ending supply of Gas!

Score: 24

Today I was so bored that I put a bit of sugar right in front of an ant. The ant spent some good minutes eating the sugar, as it left to call his other ant friends, I cleaned it up so they would think she's lying.

Score: 23

What do you call a sugar daddy that you're only friends with? A paypal

Score: 22

What do vampire hummingbirds eat? Your blood sugar!

My wife won't laugh at this :(

Score: 20

I recently placed a sugar cube for an ant When he left to get the rest of the ants, I quickly removed the sugar cube. Now everyone else thinks he lied.

Score: 20

I have a new recipe that's gluten free, sugar free, no-fat, non-GMO, pesticide free, low-calorie, vegan, kosher and paleo-friendly. It's a real breath of fresh air.

Score: 19

3 paddys are out for dinner English Paddy tells his wife "pass the sugar, sugar"

Scottish Paddy asks his wife "pass the honey, honey"

Irish Paddy says "pass me the milk

Cow."

Score: 18

Sugar is a gateway drug It gets you addicted to coke

Score: 15

What's the difference between LSD, and the church of LDS? One to take with a sugar cube, the other you take with a grain of salt.

Score: 14

Glucose walks into a bar... Bartender says "what can i get for you sugar?"

Score: 14

Cute things to call your girlfriend: 1. Sugar
2. Honey
3. Flour
4. Egg
5. 1/2 lb of butter
6. Stir
7. Pour into pan
8. Preheat oven to 375°

Score: 14

The suave Englishman at the breakfast table asked his sweetheart "Please pass the sugar, sugar!" The debonair Frenchman asked his girl "Please pass the honey, honey!"
The American redneck, not to be outdone, yelled "Pass the pork, pig!"

Score: 13

It's a real-shame I failed my entry-level idiom class I came close, but no sugar.

Score: 11

I got two packs o' sugar... Call me Two Canes

^I'm ^sorry.

Score: 10

A diabetic friend I was talking to my diabetic friend the other day. He said, "this new high sugar diet I'm on is great! I lost 30 pounds already. Cost me an arm and a leg though..."

Score: 9

How to make Emo Cupcakes What You'll need:

Cupcake Tray

An oven

Milk

Butter

Eggs

Flour

Sugar

We're

Going

Down

Swingin'

Score: 7

What's the square root of a hyper cube? A sugar cube!

Score: 4

Jokes about white sugar are rare. Jokes about brown sugar? Demerara.

Score: 4

Do THOTs on the keto diet call them sugar-free daddies?

Score: 3

Why was Trump's Valentine's Day so lucrative? He got himself a sugar Vladdy.

Score: 3

[True story] My girlfriend told me tonight that sugar was my enemy. I replied "You know what they say. Keep your enemies closer than your friends."

Score: 3

Low sugar Swedish fish If they make a low sugar swedish fish, would it be Sweet-Ish Swedish-ish fish?

Score: 3

New Sugar Jokes

The temperature is so hot now in the UK that England invaded itself, enslaved its own people, and is now growing sugar cane, spices, and tea.

Score: 1

I know lots of jokes about white sugar, but I only know one about brown sugar because... Demerara

Score: 2

What's Thanos's Favorite Veggie? Sugar SNAP peas!!!!!!

Score: 2

So me and my brother ate too much sugar yesterday Now my dad dia-beats-us

Score: 2

There are hundreds of jokes about white sugar.... But when it comes to jokes about brown sugar... well... demerara

Score: 1

So I was cooking today... I heated up some oil, fried up some garlic, onion and chillis. Stirred in some chopped tomatoes, added vinegar and sugar and left it to simmer. Boy can I tell you, when it was done, it was relish!

Score: 1

Why was the sugar out of the office? Because it was on granule leave!

Score: 2

I remember the days... I remember the days when you could walk into a shop with a £1 note and come out with a 40 cigarettes, a bag of sugar and a load of bread. Can't do that nowadays though.
Too much CCTV

Score: 2

My uncle told me to cut down on sugar, or I'd get diabetes and they'd cut my foot off. Told 'em I wouldn't stand for it.

Score: 2

The other day my girl friend called me her booger sugar Because she likes to do me in secret In the bathroom.

Score: 1

Why do cannibals enjoy going to the strip club? Who doesn't enjoy eating a little Candy or Sugar every now and then?

Score: 2

Why do Chinese people stir their tea clockwise while the Japanese stir it anticlockwise? To dissolve the sugar.

(Courtesy of my dad)

Score: 2

So I was part of a double blind clinical study... So I was a part of a double blind clinical study of the effects of sugar pills on patients. Little did I know, I was part of the placebo group and was given Xanax.

Score: 3

Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies? Student: I do.... Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
Student: I don't know.
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.

Score: 1

You catch flys with sugar, you catch bees with honey, but what do you catch WASP'S with? Mayonnaise.

Score: 1

The drug dealer added sugar to his marijuana... to sweeten the pot.

Score: 2

I recently acquired my grandmother's secret recipe for ragus. She was an accomplished chemist, and managed it with only one ingredient: invert sugar.

Score: 1

I found a new recipe that's fat free, gluten free, sugar free, dairy free, preservative-free and is non-GMO. It's a real breath of fresh air.

Score: 2