Vacuum Cleaner Jokes

Contents

Funniest Vacuum Cleaner Jokes

If you think your microwave spying on you is bad... Your vacuum cleaner has been gathering dirt on you for years.

Score: 1769

I sold my vacuum cleaner the other day. All it was doing was collecting dust.

Score: 255
Funny Vacuum Cleaner Jokes
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If you think your microwave and your TV spying on you is bad. Your vacuum cleaner has been gathering dirt on you for years.

Score: 113

I'm gonna sell my vacuum cleaner. It's just collecting dust

Score: 86

Here's an old German joke: What is the difference between a Russian tank and a vacuum cleaner? There's only one dirtbag in the vacuum cleaner.

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Wife: The vacuum cleaner doesn’t suck the way it used to. Husband: Neither does the dish washer.

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I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago... ...and so far all it's been doing is gathering dust.

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I told my son that I found his hamster. He was ecstatic. Until I said it was in the vacuum cleaner.

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I’ve decided to sell my vacuum cleaner. Well, it was just collecting dust.

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What vacuum cleaner brand do Antivaxxers prefer? Dyson.

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Does anyone want to buy a vacuum cleaner? Mine is just collecting dust at the moment.

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What's an anti-vaxxers favorite vacuum cleaner? Dyson

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I've recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner... As all it was doing was collecting dust

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Being single is like a vacuum cleaner: its sucks when you’re turned on

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Apple is going to release the first smart vacuum cleaner this year The first Apple product that doesn't suck

(not hating on apple or anything but i got this joke somewhere)

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What’s the difference between a vacuum cleaner, and someone who drives a Harley Davidson? Position of the dirt bag.

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Whats the last thing your father says before killing you with a vacuum cleaner? Dyson

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Does anyone want a vacuum cleaner? Mine's just gathering dust.

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What did the father say before he killed his child with a vacuum cleaner? Dyson

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I sold my vacuum cleaner It was just gathering dust

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My wife said we need a new vacuum cleaner because ours really sucks I replied: Well then why do we need a new one?

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No matter what vacuum cleaner you buy They all suck

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I finally threw away my vacuum cleaner. It was just collecting dust.

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What's the difference between a Harley Davidson and a vacuum cleaner? Placement of the dirt bag.

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Two dust particles meet in a vacuum cleaner "Man, I hate this place" says one of them.
"Yeah, it sucks."

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Famous last words of the father, when he killed his Son with a vacuum cleaner Dyson

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I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner, it was just collecting dust at home anyway.

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I'm thinking about selling my vacuum cleaner After all, it's just collecting dust

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What is the difference between Jedward and a vacuum cleaner? A vacuum cleaner only sucks when you turn it on.

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I'm thinking about selling my vacuum cleaner... ... All it does is collect dust.

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I recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner All it was doing was gathering dust.

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What is a time travelling vacuum cleaner called? Dr Whoover

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For sale: Vacuum Cleaner £30 Reluctant sale, but it is just collecting dust.

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What do you call a janitor in space? A vacuum cleaner

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I heard that Dyson, the vacuum cleaner giants, are planning on making a new electric car... I hope it doesn't suck.

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I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago... ...so far, all it's been doing is gathering dust...

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If you clean your vacuum cleaner You're making your vacuum cleaner, and you're a vacuum cleaner

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A vacuum cleaner company removed their latest model from stores a week after launch, All user reviews said that it sucked.

Score: 5

My vacuum cleaner wasn’t working that well So I put a Honda sticker on it so it would suck more

Score: 5

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New Vacuum Cleaner Jokes

We need a new vacuum cleaner in our household. The one we've got just collects dust.

Score: 3

I haven't used my vacuum cleaner in a few months now. It's starting to collect dust.

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What did dust say to an old vacuum cleaner? You can't suck me off

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My life is like a vacuum cleaner.. ..it sucks.

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I'm having a headache because of my vacuum cleaner. It sucks.

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How do you clean up in outer space? With a vacuum cleaner...

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Had to get rid of my vacuum cleaner. It was just collecting dust.

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I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner It was just collecting dust

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I recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner... it was just gathering dust.

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So, if you need a new vacuum cleaner... Would you ask for one that sucks less or more?

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Did you hear about the Buddhist vacuum cleaner? It has no attachments.

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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner, and a lawyer on a motorcycle? The vacuum cleaner has the dirtbag on the inside.

*For a million-six points... What Netflix show- a spin-off from its famous predecessor- did this joke come from?

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I bought a new vacuum cleaner. The old one was just gathering dust.

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What's the difference between a Hoover vacuum cleaner and a Harley motorcycle? The position of the dirtbag.

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When you clean out a vacuum cleaner You become a vacuum cleaner

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I hate vacuum cleaners, they either suck, or don't work at all.

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I'm thinking of selling my old vacuum cleaner It's been gathering dust for years.

Score: 1

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