Hilarious What Do You Get Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest What Do You Get Jokes

What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes? Fat. You get fat.

What? Like I would make a pie joke on my cake day?

Score: 11775

What do you get if you divide a pumpkins circumference by its diameter? Pumpkin π

Sorry.

Score: 10802

What do you get when you eat 3.14 slices of cake? Fat. You get fat.

What? Like I would make a pie joke on my cake day?

Score: 3330

What do you get if you cross Bill Clinton and Donald Trump? Found in your cell, unresponsive.

Score: 3270

Score: 2188

What do you get if you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the zoo.

Score: 1943

What do you get if you cross Islam and Capitalism? No more jokes about the profit.

Score: 1818

What do you get when you shoot four bullets into a six pack? A Tupac...

Score: 1805

What do you get if you boil funnybones? A laughing stock.

Score: 1718

What do you get when you cross human DNA and goat DNA? Thrown out of the petting zoo

Score: 1134

From my dad: What do you get when a topless blonde rubs sun tanning oil on a topless brunette? Your camera.

Score: 1057

What do you get if you cross a highway with a fridge? Killed.

Score: 924

What do you get if you add up all the seconds of your life? A lot of food you probably didn’t need to eat.

Score: 910

What do you get when you inject human DNA into a sheep? ...banned from the petting zoo...

Score: 885

What do you get if you take off the red dot on the Japanese flag? The French flag!

Score: 798

What do you get when you cross a cow with an octopus? A visit from the Scientific Professional Ethics Committee and immediate withdrawal of your grant funding.

Score: 763

What do you get if you spell Man backwards? Flashbacks.

Score: 742

What do you get if you drop a piano down a mineshaft? A flat minor

Score: 704

What do you get when you put jelly into Flint, Michigan's water supply? Pb & J.

Score: 686

What do you get if you cross an agnostic, a dyslexic and an insomniac? Someone who lays awake at night, wondering if there is a dog.

Score: 686

What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? ...banned from the zoo. (Learned that the hard way)

Score: 591

What do you get if you give growth hormones to an ant? Tolerance

Score: 498

What do you get if you drop a piano on a child? A flat minor

Score: 487

What do you get when you mix laxatives with holy water? A religious movement.

Score: 446

What do you get when you mix an insomniac, an agnostic, and a dyslexic? A person who stays up all night wondering whether or not there is a dog.

Score: 423

What do you get when you mix a broccoli and a melon? The saddest vegetable known to man: a melonccoli.

Score: 407

What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? A lifetime ban from the petting zoo.

Score: 381

What do you get when 32 rednecks enter the same room? A full set of teeth.

Score: 326

What do you get when you cross a dog and an antenna? A Golden Receiver.

Score: 319

What do you get when you combine insomnia, dyslexia and agnosticism? Someone who lies awake at night, wondering if there is a dog.

Edit: A word

Score: 298

What do you get when you mix human DNA with goat DNA? You get kicked out of the petting zoo...

Score: 239

What do you get when you cross human DNA with goat DNA? A ban from the petting zoo.

Score: 226

What do you get when you combine Titantic with the Sixth Sense? Icy dead people.

Score: 224

What do you get when you cross goat DNA with human DNA? You get kicked out of the petting zoo

Score: 208

What do you get when you put adderall into the gas tank of a Ford Fiesta? A Ford Focus.

Score: 198

What do you get when you cross a Kangaroo and an Elephant? A letter from the Scientific Ethics Committee and a withdrawl of your grant money.

Score: 185

What do you get when you inject human DNA into a donkey? Kicked out of the petting zoo :(

Score: 161

What do you get when you crossbreed a Chihuahua with a German Shepherd? A que-nein.

Score: 117

What do you get when you divide 355 jack o'lanterns by 113 jack o'lanterns? Pumpkin Pi.

Score: 115

What do you get when you cross Hitler with Osama bin laden? Nein 11

Score: 113

New What Do You Get Jokes

What do you get when you cross a lion with a flamingo? A visit from an ethics committee and your funding revoked.

Score: 13

What do you get when you cross a Vietnamese person, and an African American? Vinegar.

Score: 16

What do you get if you give a triangle vodka? A rectangle

Score: 14

What do you get if you squeeze a synagogue? Juice!

Score: 28

What do you get when you stack 52 loaves of bread? A deck of carbs.

Score: 35

What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the zoo...

Score: 14

What do you get when you divide a pumpkin's diameter by it's circumference? Pumpkin Pi.

Score: 11

What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic? A little over half way.

Score: 12

What do you get if you eat onions and refried beans? Tear Gas

Score: 11

What do you get when you cross a terrorist and a Hawaiian food truck? Aloha snack bar!

I'm sorry

Score: 22

What do you get if you cross a frog with a rabbit? A bunny ribbit

Score: 15

What do you get when you put nutella on salmon? You get salmonella.

Hahahaha...pew pew pew...haha...*begins sobbing*

Score: 34

What do you get when you cross a Cow with and Octopus? A Visit from the ethics committee, and immediate withdrawal of your funding.

Score: 63

What do you get when you cross a hillbilly and a murder suspect? A person of incest.

Score: 32

What do you get when you cross alcohol and literature? Tequila Mockingbird.

Score: 13

What do you get when you take the vowels out of Reince Priebus' name? RNC PR BS

Score: 22

What do you get when you cross the Queen and Prince Charles? Killed in an automobile accident.

Score: 26

What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber? Nothing. You can't cross a vector with a scaler.

Score: 50

What do you get when two antenna get married? A crappy wedding but great reception.

Score: 17

What do you get when you microwave a monkey? Rhesus pieces.

I'll let myself out.

Score: 14

What do you get by crossing a baby with a puppy? Jail time.

Score: 13

What do you get when you cross Prince Charles and the queen? Murdered in a tunnel in France.

Score: 28

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a pitbull? Just the pitbull.

Score: 30

What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo

Score: 31

What do you get when you insert human DNA in a goat? Banned from the petting zoo

Score: 28

What do you get when you cross an insomniac, a dyslexic, and an agnostic? Someone who lays awake at night wondering if there's a dog.

Score: 26

What do you get when you cross a chili pepper, a shovel, and a terrier? A hot-diggity-dog!

Score: 15

What do you get when you turn a blonde girl upside down? A brunette with bad breath

Score: 11

What do you get when you mix beans and onions? Tear gas

Score: 35

What do you get when you take the red circle off the Japanese flag? The French flag.

Score: 19

What do you get when a short psychic escapes prison? A small medium at large!

Score: 12

What do you get when you crossbreed a horse with a rabbit? A dead rabbit.

Score: 10

What do you get when you spell "man" backwards? Flashbacks.

Score: 30

What do you get when you combine tragedy and comedy? American politics.

Score: 17

What do you get when you cross a bunny and a Rottweiler? Just the Rottweiler.

Score: 19

What do you get for calling a suicide hotline in Iraq? A job offer

Score: 17

What do you get when you go to a bird doctor? Tweetment

Score: 32

What do you get when you cross a sheep with a porcupine? An animal that knits its own sweaters.

Score: 40

What do you get from a sad cow? Blue cheese.

Score: 25

What do you get when you finger a Gypsy on the rag? Your palm red for free.

Score: 12

What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an agnostic and a dyslexic? Someone who lays awake at night wondering if there really is a dog.

Score: 46

What do you get if you cross an insomniac with an atheist and a dyslexic? Someone who stays up all night, wondering if there is a file after death.

Score: 55

A joke for Donald Trump - what do you get when you cross Queen Elizabeth and Prince Charles? Killed in a tunnel

Score: 38

What do you get when you mix sodium hydroxide with hydrochloric acid? Water, and /r/leagueoflegends

Score: 20

What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control? A trip without the kids

Score: 10

What do you get if you shoot a Mexican golfer? A hole in Juan.

Score: 15

What do you get when a piano falls down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

Score: 20

What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber? Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.

Score: 19

What do you get when you drop a piano on a toddler? A flat minor

Score: 27

What do you get when einstein jacks off???? a stroke of genius!!!!!

(its terrible, i know)

Score: 15

What do you get when you cross Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris? Beat up.

Score: 16

What do you get when you put human DNA in a monkey? A lifetime ban from the Zoo

Score: 31

What do you get if you put human DNA in a donkey? Banned from the zoo.

Score: 49

What do you get for opening the BEST Vietnamese soup joint in London? A great big pho queue.

Score: 15

What do you get from a frozen zombie? Frost bite. ;D

Score: 14

My 10 y/o daughter made this joke up on the way to school... What do you get when you cross Hitler with a fish? A-dolphin!

Score: 14

What do you get when you mix up literature and alcohol? Tequila mockingbird

Or Ernest Hemingway

Score: 25

What do you get when you mix liquor and literature.... Tequila Mockingbird

Score: 41

Divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter, and what do you get? Pumpkin pi.

Score: 32

What do you get when you cross a mountain and a desert? Very tired feet.

Score: 28