Autistic Jokes

TIL unvaccinated children are less likely to be autistic Because they are more likely to be dead

EDIT: Wow. Now I understand RIP inbox.

A new study shows that unvaccinated children are less likely to be autistic Because they are more likely to be dead.

I told my son he couldn't get a fidget spinner because his dad and I have tried so hard to make sure he didn't become autistic... Unfortunately he died of measles a couple days ago

A black man and an autistic man walk into a bar The autistic man orders a shot, but the black man gets it instead

Do you know why more vaccinated than unvaccinated children have autism? Because you have to be alive to be autistic

Scientists discovered that unvaccinated kids are less likely to be autistic. Because they are more likely to be dead.

TIL that children that don't get vaccines are actually less likely to be autistic Cause they're more likely to be dead.

There is a sign in my town that reads "DRIVE SLOW AUTISTIC CHILD" First of all, he has a name.
Secondly, if he has his license he should know good and well how to drive and there is no need to single him out like that.

A son says to his father... A son says to his father "Dad, I forget. Am I awesome or fantastic?"

The father replies "No son, you're autistic."

TIL unvaccinated children are less likely to be autistic Because they're more likely to be dead

What do you call a stick with autism? Autistic

At what age does the average 4chan user find out they're autistic? thREEEEEEEEE

Are you made of gold, titanium, sulfur, and carbon? Because you're AuTiSTiC.

I used to think my drawings made me autistic... it turns out my Grandma was just from Boston.

TIL that unvaccinated children are less likely to be autistic. They are most likely to be dead instead.

Are you made of Gold, Titanium, Sulfur and Carbon? Because you are AuTiSTiC.

I let the autistic kid have my seat on the bus. And that, is how I lost my job _and_ my license.

What is slowly making a comeback? The autistic child i just insulted.

TIL that unvaccinated children are less likely to be autistic because they're more likely to be dead.

What trait do autistic people and leprechauns share? They're both on the spectrum

What do you call autistic soldiers? Special forces

My mom told me I was autistic But I'm not good at drawing.

TIL unvaccinated children are less likely to be autistic Turns out most of them are dead

I used have a friend who was on the spectrum I asked him, “On what spectrum, the electromagnetic spectrum?”

He responded, “No, I’m autistic.”

So I responded, “So what, you don’t understand jokes?”

Worst pickup lines I must be autistic, because you've been running through my mind all day.

What do you get when you mix a public speaker with someone who had tourettes? A clock!
One provides the tic, the other provides the talk

Credit to my Autistic Big Bro

If you're German and autistic? Wouldn't you be auschwitztic?

What do you call an autistic Chinese baby? Sum Ting-Wong

My teacher told me that I am unique But when I told my mom what my teacher said she replied," Sweetie, just because you are autistic doesn't make you special".

I gave some autistic kids weed... And now I have baked potatoes.

I’m thinking about losing my virginity to an autistic person I want my first time to be special

What was the autistic kid on the floor doing? His best

Roses are red Violets are violet

This makes no sense

Autistic pilot

What do you call it when an autistic kid gets vaccinated? A level up.

An autistic and a vegan walk into a bar You only know because they mention it every other sentence

What do you call it when an autistic kid smokes weed? Baked Potato

What did the Jewish Bostonian woman declare to her Sunday bridge group about her recent knitting project? "I'm so AUtistic!"

EDIT: Ahtistic.

What’s worse than a child with autism? A parent who’d prefer a dead child over an autistic one.

#Autistic&Awesome

An anti-vaxxer had 5 sick kids and then 4 died... how many did he have left? The one autistic one.