Hilarious Cake Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Cake Jokes

What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes? Fat. You get fat.

What? Like I would make a pie joke on my cake day?

Score: 11775

It's my cake day today, so I'll give you one of my favourite jokes. What do you call an Irish man bouncing off the walls?

Rick O Shea

Score: 4111

What do you get when you eat 3.14 slices of cake? Fat. You get fat.

What? Like I would make a pie joke on my cake day?

Score: 3330

I can't believe no one has managed to come up with a cure for anorexia yet... I thought it'd be a piece of cake...

Score: 2454

Score: 1338

Eating too much cake is the deadly sin of gluttony But not eating too much pie, because the sin of pi is always zero.

Score: 1173

I bought a chessboard cake from the bakers last week. Took one bite, looked up, and said "it's stale mate".

He seemed surprised, said "no, mate".

So I handed him the cake and said "check mate".

Score: 1072

Why did the kid eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
-My 6 year old Nephew

Score: 1014

Actual joke dad said this morning waitress: How do you like your eggs?

dad: in a cake

Score: 754

My friend drowned. So at his funeral... ...we took a cake shaped like a life raft.

After all...It's what he would have wanted.

Score: 493

It was such an emotional wedding... Even the cake was in tiers.

Score: 225

The worst thief ever came to my birthday party today. I mean, I've seen other thieves, but this one took the cake.

Score: 193

For my cake day, I've decided that I'm not going to be drinking any more. I'm not going to drink any less either.

Score: 191

Did you hear about the party thief? I mean I've seen some crazy people at parties, but this guy definitely takes the cake.

Score: 124

If you struggle cutting cake.... Is it still a piece of cake?

Score: 121

Ordering a cake over the phone "And what would you like the cake to say?"

[covers phone to ask wife]

"Honey, do we want a talking cake?"

Score: 113

What kind of dessert makes women gain the most weight? Wedding Cake.

Score: 110

What do you call a 300 year old joke? Congress

PS: One day till cake day :D 11m 30d

Score: 110

A guy goes to a cake shop and says: - Can you please make me a cake that says "you are the only one for me"?
- Yes sir.
- Well, I'll order five of those.

Score: 107

If a wedding goes off without a hitch, did anyone get married? It's my cake day!

Score: 107

Ever been to a bulimic's birthday party? (fixed) The cake jumps out of the girl.

Score: 97

How do you get a fat girl into bed? Piece of cake.

Score: 94

A friend once asked me how to get a fat girl to fall in love with me. I replied, "piece of cake."

Score: 87

It’s my cake day today so I figured I’d try out a cake joke! Patient: Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake.

Doctor: Next time, take off the candles

Score: 83

It’s my cake day so here’s a little cake joke for you all... What do rat’s like to eat on their birthday?
Mice cream and cake

I’ll see myself out.

Score: 81

If meat is murder... ...then is cake battery?

Score: 77

What is 20ft long and has 5 teeth? The funnel cake line at the Alabama state fair

Score: 75

How do you get a fat girl into bed? It's a piece of cake

Score: 72

A man walks into a bakery with a salmon under his arm and says “do you have fish cakes?” The chap behind the counter replies, “No”.
“That’s a pity, it’s his birthday”.

(It’s a cake day joke—-ugh I’ll see myself out)

Score: 70

Doctors say they found a food that causes years of pain and suffering after its eaten... It's called wedding cake

Score: 68

Want to know how to get a fat girl in bed? It’s a piece of cake

Score: 50

How'd you get a fat girl into bed? Piece of cake..

Score: 36

Two Scotsmen walk past a baker One turns to the other and says 'Is that a cake or a meringue?'

The other replies 'no you're right, it's a cake'

Score: 36

I went to a very emotional wedding the other day Even the cake was in tiers

Score: 31

Cake day post: What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot

Score: 28

I went to a really emotional wedding today... ...Even the cake was in tiers.

Score: 27

I went to a really depressing wedding recently. Even the cake was in tiers.

Score: 19

Why did the student eat his homework? Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake.

Score: 18

A Simple Guide to Cake Consumption If it's 1 o'clock and you're not hungry enough to eat the whole cake, eat half of it now and the other half in an hour. You can halve your cake and eat at 2.

Score: 13

An old Ethiopian proverb You can't have your cake or eat it.

Score: 12

New Cake Jokes

Cake day joke: Why couldn’t the teddy bear finish his cake? He was already stuffed.

Score: 3

Why does a skeleton upvote every cake day post? Cause it was his DOOT-ty

Score: 4

I was on the beach and got hit by a massive wave of cake It was a tiramisunami.

Score: 2

Contrary to popular beliefs, losing weight is a piece of cake. Just don't pick it up.

Score: 3

Today I finally said “I love you” to my cake. It burst into tiers.

Score: 4

Everybody said it would be impossible to make a dessert pizza. It turned out to be a pizza cake.

Score: 7

My cake day is 24/7 No, really, it is

Score: 1

Today I made a dessert for the first time in my life And it was a piece of cake

Score: 8

A pair of twins were in a cake shop... They were looking for a birthday cake but just couldn’t decide on a topping.

Twin 1: “I want chocolate”

Twin 2: “I want skittles”

Twin 1: “How about we do Rock Paper Scissors?”

Twin 2: “Why would I want that on my cake?”

Score: 6

How do you get a fat chick to get in bed with you? Piece of cake.

Score: 3

How do get a fat chick to go to bed with you? Piece of cake!

Score: 5

Look, I'm gonna teach you how to fulfill your fat fetish and help you seduce someone fat. Trust me I've easily done it before. It's a piece of cake.

Score: 4

Do you know the secret to getting a fat chick in bed? It's a piece of cake.

Score: 4

For me, walking in the desert is like a piece of cake... ... I get baked

Score: 1

I've heard of some evil criminals before . . . but this bakery thief really takes the cake!

Score: 7

Q: How do you get a fat chick into bed with you? A: Its a piece of cake!

Score: 3

I really enjoy a nicely deconstructed Black Forrest cake It's fantastic, I just leave out the cream, the chocolate, the sponge and the cherries, allowing me to enjoy the wholesome Kirsch

Score: 1

There have been a lot of bakery robbers lately... But this one takes the cake.

Score: 3

What do you call a scary cake that keeps coming back? A boo meringue

Score: 6

Most people like their eggs fried or scrambled, I like mine baked... in cookies, brownies and cake.

Score: 4

My dad fell on some cake yesterday. He said the most dad joke ever. "Desserts on me, everybody."

Score: 4

A woman stole from our bakery today We've had some bad stuff happen, but this really takes the cake.

Score: 4

How do you get a fat person into bed with you? Its a piece of cake.

Score: 1

I got arrested for touching someone with cake mix on my hands It was batter-y.

Score: 3

I bought a chessboard cake from the baker’s today. I took one bite and said, “It’s stale, mate.”

He seemed surprised and said, “No, mate.”

I handed it to him and said, “Check mate.”

Score: 1

I've dated a lot of fat kleptomaniacs in my time. But this one takes the cake.

Score: 4

How can you tell that a wedding cake is sad? Just look at the tiers.

Score: 5

I went to a bulimic bachelor party last weekend A cake jumped out of the stripper.

Score: 3

A child comes out of the bathroom and sees his mother baking a cake "Mommy, can I lick the bowl?"
"No sweetie, you have to flush like everyone else!"

Score: 9

What does Tumblr and cake have in common? They're both full of trans fats.

Score: 4

My wife didn't like my apology cake. I guess it was a little half-baked

Score: 2

How many blondes do you need to bake a chocolat cake? Three. One for the dough and two are peeling the M&Ms

Score: 5

Today is the Dali Lamas 82nd birthday but he couldn't decide if he wanted a vanilla, chocolate, or strawberry birthday cake... ...so he decided to be made one with everything.

Score: 3

When the Chinese-Egyptian guy at work brings in cake: "For he's a jolly good Pharaoh..."

Score: 1

What's the difference between funnel cake and a punk rocker's hairdo? One is fried dough and the other is a dyed fro

Score: 4

Why did the school kids eat their homework? Because their teacher told them it was a piece of cake.

Score: 5

I've met a lot of bakery thieves before... But this one takes the cake.

Score: 6

What food makes women gain weight fastest? Wedding cake.

Score: 3

A woman woke her husband in the middle of the night and said, " I think there's a burglar downstairs and he's eating the cake that my mother made for us. "

" Who do you want me to call? " said the husband

" The police or an ambulance? "

Score: 3

What did the cake say to the chef? Remember the a LA mode

Score: 1

While I was at work, I heard this "Dad Joke" as a father and his kid were walking by. Daughter: Dad, I want a cake pop!

Dad: What's that?

Daughter: It's exactly what it sounds like!

Dad: Oh, it's the father of all cakes?

Dad: \*huge grin\*

Score: 1

My wedding was beautiful! Even the cake was in tiers!

Score: 5

The secret to having your cake and eating it too 2 cakes

Score: 1

Why did the kid eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.

Score: 1

My grandma told me that hair is the secret ingredient in her famous carrot cake She says it tastes better when you put real keratin

Score: 1

I went to a pretty sad wedding last night. Even the cake was in tiers.

Score: 2

How do you get a fat chick into bed? Piece of cake

Score: 6

5 easy steps for eating healthier today 1. Go to kitchen
2. Look around in search of healthy snack
3. See cake sitting on counter
4. Eat all of it
5. Leave kitchen

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Score: 3

Why did the boy eat this homework? Because the teacher said, it was a piece of cake.

Score: 7

I went to a bulimic friend's birthday party... I got to see the cake come out of the girl!

Score: 1

One of the cakes is missing from my German cake stall... ... I'm worried that it was stollen.

Score: 4

My Wedding was really emotional Even the cake was in tiers.

Score: 4

I know how to get any fat woman in to bed It truly is a piece of cake

Score: 2

How to seduce a fat chick? Piece of cake.

Score: 6

I finished my culinary class final. It was a piece of cake.

Score: 7

I had a counter-strike themed birthday party. We played CS, we had paintball in a arena made to look like dust, we played CS party games, i got Skins, and finally ate a Cake shaped like dust.

It was de_licious

Score: 2

How do you pick up a fat chick? Piece of cake.

Score: 4

Just learned the secret to getting a fat girl in bed.. ..it's a piece of cake

Score: 8

A couple of camels are walking in the dessert... And I was like: hey get out of my ice cream cake, you camels.

Score: 2

What do you called a racist bakery store? The Cake-Cake-Cake!

Score: 5