Eagle Jokes

Your parents in 1996: Don't trust ANYONE on the Internet. Your parents in 2017: Freedom Eagle dot Facebook says Hillary invented AIDS.

Your parents in 1996: "Don't trust ANYBODY on the internet!" Your parents today: "Freedom Eagle dot facebook says Hillary invented AIDS."

Did you know that it’s wrong to breed eels with eagles? It’s eel-eagle.

Why can’t you breed a eel with and eagle? It’s Eeleagle

Why can't an eel and an eagle team up? Because it would be eel-eagle!

Why can't you breed an eel with an eagle? Because it's eeleagle.

Today is the day "Bring your pet at school " Can I bring my desert eagle?

I'm relieved the Patriots lost... No patriot I know would ever beat an eagle.

I’ve got the heart of a lion and the eye of an eagle... And now i’m banned from entering the zoo.

I Saw a Huge Seagull Today It was big enough to be a D Gull.

But not quite big enough to be an Eagle

An eel tried to propose to an eagle... the eel asks the eagle
"We may look different but I think I love you. Will you marry me?"
"I'm sorry but I can't" says the eagle.
"Why not?" asks the eel.
The eagle replies with "Because that would be eel-eagle"

I saw a really big seagull today It was easily big enough to be a D gull, but not quite big enough to be an eagle.

Did you guys hear about the guy who got the skin on his face ripped apart by eagle talons? They tried to fix it with botox, but that only helps with crow's feet.

Son of chief: "Father, how are we named?" Chief: "After you are born, your mother looks out of the teepee and names you the first thing she sees."

Son: "Oh wow, is that how you were named Soaring Eagle?"

Chief: "Yes, Horse Taking Dump"

The Eagle- an original joke A man is talking with an eagle.

The man asks, "Eagle, how can you catch your prey so well if you just fly over really fast?"

The eagle responds, "I don't know, I guess I just have a talon for it."

What do you call an Eagle who can't catch it's prey? *Talon*tless.


...Sorry.

My father recently passed away. I'll never forget how much I inherited.
From him I got the eye of an eagle, the heart of a lion and so much more.


He was the best hunter this world has ever seen.

If the eagle is the bird of war and the dove is the bird of Love ! What is the bird of true love ? The Swallow!

What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live underground. Except for the eagle.

I was laying in my hotel room bed, naked and spread eagle, when the cleaning lady comes in. Finally.

How Can You Identify a Bald Eagle? All his feathers are combed to one side

What does a flying rabbit has on his back? An eagle

Why did the sick eagle get deported? Because he was an illeagle.

I was arrested the other day for keeping a sick bird of prey. Turns out it was ill eagle

My diseased eagle has been banned by the government. I suppose that makes it

an illegal ill eagle.

Why did the ancient Roman police arrest an Eagle? Because he was... Aquila.

What do you call a religious eagle? _A bird of pray_

Why did the sick bird get deported? He was an ill eagle.

What did the Native American pornstar call himself? Spread Eagle

What's the difference between a hawk and an eagle? All birds have specialized tail feathers called pinions. An eagle has 8 pinions, while a hawk only has 7. So you could say the difference is only a matter of a pinion.

I saw a seagull I saw a huge seagull this morning. It was big enough to be a D gull... But not quite big enough to be an eagle. One thing's for sure, it definitely wasn't a beagle.

When checking in for his flight, the wedge-tailed eagle was asked: Would you like to check some baggage or purchase an in-flight meal? The eagle replied: No thanks. I'll just have my carrion.

Why couldn't the eagle fly out of the country? Because it was an ill eagle.

Did you hear about the eagle that had to eat it's own eggs to survive? They said it had no egrets.

Did you know it's against the law to breed eels with eagles? It's eel-eagle.

The difference between a Life Scout and an Eagle Scout. A Life Scout is ready for anything. The Eagle Scout is ready for Murphy's Law.

What did the eagle say to the viking after the hunting trip? “Sorry, but this time there’s no trophy for your trophy case, Keenum!”

What do you call an eagle in church? ...bird of prey

What happened to the eagle when it broke its wing? It got grounded.