Hilarious Laughing Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Laughing Jokes

When she was growing up, everybody laughed when Amy Schumer said she wanted to be a comedian... Nobody's laughing now.

Score: 17430

What's the difference between me and Jimmy Fallon? I can get through a Jimmy Fallon sketch without laughing.

Score: 16502

If you boil a funny bone it becomes a laughing stock. That's pretty humerus.

Score: 14657

Score: 2135

What do you call cows that have a sense of humor? Laughing stock.

Score: 2130

Where would you park your camel? The Camelot.

PS Booze helped with this and now I'm laughing alone in my apartment

Edit: Went to class, came back, saw this. Me and my cat are thoroughly pleased.

Score: 2059

What's the difference between Jimmy Fallon and myself? I can get through a Jimmy Fallon joke without laughing.

Score: 1920

At the pharmacy I asked for 50 condoms. 2 girls behind me started laughing. I turned around, looked them straight in the eyes and said, "Make that 52."

Score: 1754

What do you get if you boil funnybones? A laughing stock.

Score: 1718

When Amy Schumer was a child, people laughed at her when she said she’d be a comedian No one’s laughing now.

Score: 1603

If Al Gore tried his hand as a musician, his album would be called... **Algorithms.**

Girlfriend thought of this while doing dishes earlier.... I could hear her laughing to herself in the other room for almost 10 minutes.

Score: 1600

My 7 Year Old Cousin just told me this yo mamas so fat when she fell down no one was laughing but the ground was cracking up

Score: 1428

People use to laugh at me when I said I wanted to be a comedian Well, no one is laughing now.

Score: 1384

The other day I got pulled over by a cop. When he walked up, I pulled out my 9mm... Once he stopped laughing, he wrote me up for indecent exposure...

Score: 1309

What’s the difference between me and Jimmy Fallon? I can make it through one of his sketches without laughing.

Score: 1252

The other day I got pulled over, and when the cop walked up I pulled out my 9mm Once he stopped laughing he wrote me up for indecent exposure

Score: 1034

People use to laugh at me when I would say "I want to be a comedian" Well nobody is laughing now.

Score: 951

Yo momma's so fat, that when she fell no one was laughing but the ground was cracking up.

Score: 935

Everybody laughed at me when I said I was going to be a standup comedian. They're not laughing now.

Score: 832

If you boil a funny bone It becomes a laughing stock

Score: 804

When I was a kid everyone laughed when I said I wanted to be a comedian... well no ones laughing now.

Score: 636

My manly password My wife and I were trying to set up a new password for our computer.

Trying to be clever, I put "Mypenis" and my wife fell to the ground laughing hysterically because on the screen it said:

**"Error. Not long enough."**

Score: 420

If you boil your funny bone, it becomes a laughing stock That's humerus.

Score: 366

Today my son asked, "Can I have a book mark?" I burst out laughing, 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

Score: 358

Ha - mildly amusing Haha - laughing

Hahaha - saracstic laughing

Hahahaha - Staying Alive

Score: 348

They laughed at me when I said I will become a comedian Well, they are not laughing now.

Score: 338

They laughed when I said I was going to be a comedian. Well, they're not laughing now.

Score: 317

How do you make a gingerbread man’s bed? With a cookie sheet.

Direct from the lips of my 4yo daughter. I almost died laughing. I was expecting something ridiculous.

Score: 276

At Walgreens I asked for 50 condoms. 2 girls behind me started laughing. I turned around and looked them in the eyes and said, "Make it 52".

Score: 238

What's the difference between me and Jimmy Fallon? I can get through his monologue without laughing.

Score: 227

I got a strange note in my bag at the Taco Bell drive-thru last night... The lady seemed very frazzled and the note said "help there are two armed men inside."

I drove off laughing, thinking "well yeah it would take forever to make tacos with one arm"

Score: 211

My girlfriend and I are always laughing about how competitive we are. I laugh more.

Score: 147

I walk into a bar... ... And the waitress runs up to me and says. Please tell me you know CPR. I said, "LADY! not only that I know the whole alphabet". The whole bar was laughing, all except one guy...

Score: 118

Boy: My mother's name is Laughing and my father's name is Smiling. Teacher: You must be Kidding.

Boy: No, that's my sister's name, I'm Joking.

Score: 110

People used to laugh at me when I would say “I want to be a comedian". well nobody’s laughing now.

Score: 109

When Amy Schumer was growing up, everybody laughed when she said she wanted to be a comedian... Nobody is laughing now

Score: 81

My 8-Year old patient was so pround, mom was not. Q: What type of bees make milk?

A: BOO-Bees!

And then he just couldn't stop laughing. Mom turned 50 shades of red and blamed dad. Good times.

Score: 63

Everyone laughed at me when I said I wanted to do stand-up Well no ones laughing now

Score: 37

I was pulled over by the police today, so I whipped out my nine millimetre... After they stopped laughing, they arrested me for indecent exposure.

Score: 24

Dad just dropped this at my cousin's 8th birthday party...I was the only one to burst out laughing.. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?

Ten tickles.

Score: 23

New Laughing Jokes

What do you get if you boil a funny bone? Laughing stock.

Score: 3

I was singing the song “I’m a Believer” on the train and some lady told me to shut up because she thought it was annoying. I started laughing because I thought she was kidding. But then i saw her face.

Score: 2

They all laughed at me when I said I’ll be the funniest comedian in history But now, no ones laughing.

Score: 6

Why are corn fields great comedians? Cause they make a laughing stock out of everything!

Score: 1

I bought a computer with Windows Vista installed on it. People were joking and laughing at me for the "bad deal" I had made. Little do they know, I got legimate Windows 95 too. All original. Joke's on them, I consider this as a Win Win situation.

Score: 2

Everybody teased Amy Schumer when she said she wanted to be a comedian Well, no one's laughing now

Score: 4

A man walks into a room of people laughing He ask's "what's everyone laughing about?"

The other man says "it's a geography joke, you had to have been there!"

Score: 2

When I was growing up, my grandpa would say when he's leaving. I'm going to see a man about a dog that wears lipstick. Then he'd start laughing..

I never really thought about it or got it until today...

He was telling me he was gonna see a pimp to get a hooker..

Score: 1

I tried telling higher value jokes in Walmart but nobody was laughing. I guess it wasn't my Target Audience.

Score: 2

When she was young, people laughed at Amy Schumer when she said she wanted to be a comedian. Guess what, no one is laughing now.

Score: 6

Why was everyone besides the outdoorsman laughing? It was an inside joke.

Score: 9

What do you get if you mix laughing gas and helium? He He He

Score: 5

Everyone was laughing at me yesterday for not knowing what apocalypse means But I guess it's not the end of the world.

Score: 12

What do you call it when a clown farts? Laughing gas

Score: 7

Person 1: My dad's name is Laughing and my mom's name is Smiling. Person 2: You must be kidding.

Person 1: No, that's my brother. I'm Joking.

Score: 2

Why did the comedian get banned from performing for prisoners? His jokes made people break out laughing.

Score: 2

What goes "hahahaha" then *Thump*? A man laughing his head off.

Score: 5

Heard this from a waiter at dinner tonight. Hey baby, my name is Olaf...like the snowman. Mind if I melt inside you?

Five star restaurant I am laughing out loud right now hahaj

Score: 1

Why was the mountain stream laughing? Because it's banks were hill-areas...

Score: 2

What's the difference between a seagull and a pelican? You can't sea a pelican.

Note: I'm actually on laughing gas rn btw.

Score: 3

In Soviet Union we had old joke about Stalin But you would die laughing if you heard it

Score: 15

I saw a lady in Church light a cigarette during Mass... I was laughing so hard I dropped my beer.

Score: 2

A boy and a girl are playing naked in the sand, when the boy starts laughing at the girl that she does not have a peepee. The girl just grins and says... When I grow up, I will have as many peepees as I like.

Score: 14

My friends laughed at me when I said I wanted to be a comedian. .... Well they're not laughing now!

Score: 5

Joke from my daughter - "Knock Knock."
- "Who's There?"
- "I Did App."
- "I Did App Who?"
- *Breaks Out Laughing*

Score: 15

"The truth shall set you free" I tell my kids. Then they usually reply "c'mon dad that's so tacky and cliche"

And then I laugh trying to get them to laugh

Then they start laughing

Then I laugh even more!

Thetruth is the pass word to their cages!

Bahahahaha!

Score: 3

Everyone laughed when I told em I was gonna be a comedian Well nobody's laughing now.

Score: 10

Obesity is no laughing matter. Because laughing burns calories.

Score: 7

I texted my friend a funny binary joke the other day. He responded "5"... Laughing out loud I see...

Score: 2

When she was growing up, everybody laughed when Amy Schumer said she wanted to be a comedian. Nobody is laughing now.

Score: 6

Bloom County I used to read Bloom County (a comic strip).

Remember when they put Donald Trump's brain in Bill the Cat?

Who's laughing now.

Score: 4

When Kathy Griffin was 10 years old, she stood up at the dinner table and announced to her family that she was going to grow up and become a stand-up comedian. They all laughed in her face. No one is laughing now.

Score: 8

All the kids used to laugh at Amy Schumer when she said she wanted to be a comedian when she grew up. Nobody is laughing now.

Score: 7

A guy fell in a puddle Everybody was laughing but i have a dry sense of humor

Score: 11

People laughed when I said I wanted to be a professional snooker player. They're not laughing now because it was ages ago.

Score: 1

Why don't clowns invest their money in the market? They'd be the laughing stock.

Score: 20

An intestine doctor was laughing with an egg when another egg approached The egg asks "what's so funny?"

The doctor replied "It's an inside yoke"

Score: 1

Did you hear about the man with a laughing tic who accidentally killed someone? He was found guilty of involuntary mans(laughter).

Score: 3

What would happen if a clown opened his business up to the global market? He would be a laughing stock!

Score: 1

Laughing scale Ha – Mildly amusing

Haha – Funny

Hahaha – Sarcastic laugh

Hahahaha – Stayin alive

Score: 20

People laughed at me when I said I wanted to be a comedian. Well, they're not laughing now.

Score: 1

My dad once told me it's important to always laugh at your mistakes and accidents He then looked at me and started laughing

Score: 5

What do you call it when a hyena farts? Laughing gas.

Score: 1

Life is one big joke The only difference is even when i ruin it my dad's still laughing at me

Score: 1

I punched a clairvoyant who was laughing at me once. I like to strike a happy medium

Score: 10

Punch me - *gives friend friendly punch and laughs*

friend- "why r u laughing? how is a punch funny?"

me- "because it was a PUN-ch"

friend- *facepalms*

Score: 2

In Soviet Russia, a Judge bursts into his chambers laughing *"I've just heard the funniest joke about Stalin... ever!"*

*"Well, go ahead and tell us."*, the other Judges ask.

*"I can't. I just gave someone a life sentence for it."*

Score: 7

my mom said laughing makes me sympathic Seems the people at the funeral see it differently.

Score: 2

Said this joke in a dream and I woke up laughing. What's the cure for baseball?

Alzheimer's.

Score: 1

My friend was stressed before a party. "Why is my weed dealer *always* late, but my coke dealer early?" he said.

"Your coke dealer is the faster driver," I replied. "And the weed dealer is probably still laughing at the gear stick."

Score: 2

The kids are always laughing at my stupid jokes... But I'm really not dad funny.

Score: 3

My friends and family all laughed at me when I told them that one day, I was going to be a great comedian... Well, nobody's laughing now!

Score: 2

what can be said about german humor it's no laughing matter

Score: 2

People use to laugh at me when I said I wanted to be a comedian. No ones laughing now!

:(

Score: 18

A small village soup chef tried to make a bit of extra money on the side, selling boullion cubes laced with marijuana... It was the laughing stock of the whole town.

Score: 4

They all laughed when I told them I'm going to be a comedian... well...they are not laughing anymore!

Score: 2

I was going to tell a celery joke but it might become a laughing stalk.

O_o

Score: 3

How he set the new pasword for his computer A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, "Mypenis," and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, "Error. Not long enough."

Score: 4

I once joked about Ebola. Everyone started laughing. It was contagious.

Score: 15

Mate your passwords not long enough A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, "Mypenis," and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, "Error. Not long enough."

Score: 1