Hilarious Midgets Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Midgets Jokes

Score: 890

What do you call a pizza joint run by epileptic midgets? Little Seizure's

Score: 866

Make the little things count... teach midgets arithmetic.

Score: 647

Why do midgets make bad parents? Cause they struggle to put food on the table

Score: 548

You've got to hand it to midgets Because they cant reach it themselves

Score: 363

Why don't midgets ever get accepted into nudist colonies? They keep sticking their noses into everyone else's business.

Score: 359

When midgets smoke weed... ...do they get high, or do they just get medium?

Score: 354

I started teaching Maths to midgets in my area. I'm making little things count.

Score: 354

The police just released a statement that someone is going around pickpocketing midgets. I'm surprised someone could stoop so low.

Score: 299

I read in the local paper someone was going around pickpocketing midgets. I never thought someone could stoop so low.

Score: 293

What do dwarves and midgets have in common? Very little

Score: 176

I'm starting a business.... I'm gonna do math tutoring, but solely for midgets. I'm calling it Making The Little Things Count.

Score: 142

Today, I made the little things count by teaching math to midgets.....

Score: 137

Make the little things count Teach math to midgets

Score: 134

What do midgets and dwarfs have in common? Very little.

Score: 116

I don't understand people who pickpocket midgets How could they stoop so low?

Score: 106

I'll tell you what I know about midgets... Very little

Score: 87

Why do midgets wear short dresses? So they can show off a little leg.

Score: 69

Make little things count they say. Henceforth I will be teaching midgets some math.

Score: 41

We need to make the little things count; Teach the midgets math.

Score: 38

My dad told me to make little things count I'm now teaching midgets math.

Score: 37

Not even mildly pc joke What's the difference between a pack of midget spies and a group of women joggers?

Well, the midgets are cunning runts.

Score: 35

Both my grandparents were midgets They struggled to put food on the table their whole lives

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Q: What do you call a party with 100 midgets? A: A little get together.

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I raised the alarm at work today... The midgets were furious.

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What do you call a party with 100 midgets? A little get together.

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I sell prosthetics to midgets who are amputees... I'm a small arms dealer.

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New health study on the psychology of midgets Shows that 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren't happy

Score: 28

A group of midgets were planning to rob a butcher's... But the steaks were just too high.

Score: 28

"It's the little things in life that make you laugh" I never understood that until I saw two midgets fighting in Wal-Mart.

Score: 28

Two midgets got into an altercation. Don't worry, it was a short fight.

Score: 14

You shouldn't call short people "midgets". It isn't the right gnomenclature.

Score: 11

How many midgets does it take to change a lightbulb? One. And maybe a ladder. They're short, not retarded!!!

Score: 10

Ripple Its when a group of midgets do the wave.

Score: 8

So I was golfing with some midgets today.. Needless to say, their short game was on point.

Score: 4

What do midgets and poor people have in common? They both have trouble putting food on the table.

Score: 4

Why are Mexican midgets called a paragraph? Because they're too short to be an essay.

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I hear that midgets hate short jokes... ...so now I usually tell long ones.

Score: 3

There was a group of introverted midgets It was said that there was no small talk...just small people

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Why are midgets so bad at running marathons? Because they’re short of breath.

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New Midgets Jokes

What's the difference between a group of clever midgets and a women's track team? One's a bunch of cunning runts.

Score: 2

I was working the counter at Dominos and three midgets came in to pick up orders. I thought they'd prefer Little Caesars.

Score: 3

What do you call it when 2 midgets do 69? ea

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Why don't midgets get haircuts? Because they already have a short back and sides.

Score: 3

How are modern rappers and midgets alike? They’re both lil.

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How many midgets does it take to lift something with a crane? As many you can use to make a long chain.

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It must be hard to have a mom and dad who are both midgets. they're always really short with eachother

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Are midgets and other little people more succinct, conversationally? The short answer is: yes.

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How to get midgets to drink your beer. Try setting the bar low.

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I hate hearing jokes about midgets and roller coasters. They usually come up short.

Score: 1