Moron Jokes

[At the scene of the murder] Cop 1: This seems racially motivated. Cop 2: Hate crime?

Cop 1: Of course I hate crime, moron. That’s why I’m a cop.

Man tries to open a bank account Teller asks him : "Your name?"
"J-j-jj-hhh-on S-ss-mm-i-tthh"
"Oh you stutter?"
"No my dad did but the person who did by birth certificate was a complete moron."

My idiot friend keeps saying, “Every time I go to Taco Bell, I get diarrhea.” I said, “Try ordering Tacos instead, moron.”

What's a pregnant woman, a frozen beer, and a burnt pizza have in common? Some moron didn't pull it out.

Politics is like driving No matter which lane you're in, anyone moving faster than you is a maniac and anyone going slower is a moron.

It's with a heavy heart that I give a shout-out to my dad who couldn't be with us to see Endgame tonight. I miss you with all my heart. Maybe pre-order your tickets on time next time, moron.

There was a big moron and a little moron sitting on a ledge, who fell off first? The big moron, because the other guy was a little more on.

Are news readers secretly insulting you? **Moron this story later.**

A moron attempted to commit suicide... ... they failed to find the edge of the Earth.

My wife called me seductively and asked me if I can be naked when she gets home from work. Now I’m sitting on the couch with my father-in-law like a moron.

There are two morons sitting on a fence A big moron and a little moron. Suddenly, the big moron falls off whilst the little moron stays on!

All because he was a little moron.

What did the super smart dude say to the moron? What did the super smart dude say to the moron?

The wife's dog died... Knowing how much she loved that dog the husband got her another dog, exactly the same as the one that died.

He gave her the dog and she yelled at him: Moron!! What am I going to do with 2 dead dogs?!?

Me: what does a pirate drive? My friend: a CARGGHH?

Me: no, a ship you moron.

A big moron and a little moron were sitting on a log. The big moron fell off, but the latter remained. Why? Because he was a little more on!

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl use the restroom? Because they’re extinct moron

guy: Doctor help me, my wifi is in labor doc: Don't panic, is this her first child ?

guy: No, this is her husband you moron!

I asked my phone "Siri, why am I so bad with women?" She said "I'm Alexa you moron."

What do you call a smart idiot? An oxy-moron

Do you know why all the O2 molecules are intelligent? Because an stupid one would be an Oxy-Moron.

A big moron and a little moron were walking along a bridge... When, suddenly, the big moron fell off and into the river!

Fortunately, the little moron was able to stay on the bridge, if only because he was a little more on.

(Joke credit to Stephen King)

What do you call a smart teenager that starts doing drugs because they think it's cool? An Oxy-moron

A farmer walks into his kitchen with a duck under his arm He looks at his wife and says, "This is the pig I've been sleeping with."

His wife says, "That's not a pig, you moron!"

The farmer says, "I wasn't talking to you."

Girlfriend: ”If anything happens to me, you should meet other women.” Boyfriend: (Did exactly just that)

Girlfriend: “I meant if I died, Peter... I was stuck in traffic you moron.”

the big universe two friends Jake & bill laying in the tent camping

bill: Jake what are you looking at

Jake: the stars

bill: and what you get from that

Jake: how big the universe is and how small we are

bill: no the fu\*\*ing tent is gone you moron

Bar joke A woman walks into a bar carrying a duck under her arm. The bartender asks "Hey where did you get that pig"? The woman replies "This is not a pig it's a duck, you moron." "I know I was talking to the duck.

A big moron and a little moron were standing on the edge of a roof. Suddenly a gust of wind came and the big one fell off, but the little one didn't. Why? He was a little more on.

A Jew, a Muslim and a Trump supporter walk into a bar Drink, talk, laugh and have a good time.
That’s what happens when you are not a moron

Found the moron that doesn't know what "thou" means. It's obviously you.

Why did the big moron fall off and the little moron didn't? Because he was a little moron.

The big moron and the little moron were sitting on a wall. The big one fell off but the little one didn't. Why? Because he was a little moron

Why did Donald Trump keep adding decorations to the Christmas Tree? Because people kept shouting "moron" at him.

Did you hear about the guy who is surrounded by positive people at his workplace? Yeah. He really hates his job at the HIV clinic. He is such a negative moron.

The big moron and the little moron were sitting on a wall. The big moron fell off but the little one didn't. Why? Because he was a little moron

Wrong Side of the Road A guy calls his wife.
"Honey," he asks, "where are you?"
"I'm on the highway," she replies.
"Well, be careful. Im seeing here on TV that there's some moron driving on the wrong side of the road there."
"Just the one?" she replies. "I see thousands of 'em!"

A big moron and a little moron were sitting on the edge of a cliff. The big moron fell off. Why didn't the little moron fall off?

- The little moron was a little more on.

What's the difference between a moron and a Mormon? One of them *gets it.*

I'm going to have to sign an idiot contract But moron that later.

I walked into a bookshop and said to the girl behind the counter "I'm looking for a book by Shakespeare". "Which one?" She replied. "William, you moron".