Rose Jokes

Kid1: Hey Dad why am I called lily? Dad: Because a lily petal fell on your head when you were a baby.

Kid2: Hey Dad why am I called rose?

Dad: Because a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby.

Kid3: herdurrrrahduhrgh#%*?

Dad: Shut up Cinderblock

What mom loves... Son: Mom, why is my cousin's name rose?

Mom: Well son, your aunt really loves flowers!

Son: Mom, what do you love?

Mom: Richard, stop asking so many questions!

If you missed the ball drop last night.... Just watch FSU in the Rose Bowl

"Dad, why is my sister's name Esor?" "Because your mother loves roses, her name is rose backwards."

"Thanks Dad!"

"No problem Lana."

Why did Rose not buy the iPhone 7 Cause it didn't have a Jack

I was sailing my boat when a massive hand rose out of the water and then slowly disappeared. I thought, "Thats the biggest wave I’ve ever seen."

What's better than a rose on your piano? Tulips on your organ

EDIT: This blew up. (No pun intended)

A short poem about women's underwear... > Rose's are red,
Violet's are blue,
Heather's are green.

~Lee Mack

"Dad, why is my sister called Rose?" "Becausr your mother likes roses."

"Thanks dad"

"No problem Alex."

What is better than a rose on a piano? Tulips on the organ.

(I'll show myself out...)

The pilot said, "We are having engine trouble. Who here believes in the power of prayer?"

One man rose to his feet and said, "I do!"

The pilot said, "That is good because we are one parachute short."

"Mommy why did you name me rose?" "Because, when you were born and coming out of the hospital, a rose pedal landed on your head. So we named you rose."

"Is that why my little brother is named leaf?"

"Yes it is."

"Blaaaaaaaaaargh-ddsbbbb-beeeebleeeb."

"Shut up brick!"

Roses Rose are red,

Violets are blue,

I'm schizophrenic

And so am I

A father named his sons Rose and Fridge One day Rose asked his dad:- why did you call me like that? Her father answered that when she was born a rose petal fell on her forehead. Then fridge came and asked his father: BLUAEHHUEHUEHAWHAW?

Rose Daughter 1: Daddy, why am I named Rose?
Dad: Because when your mother gave birth to you, a rose petal fell on your head.
Daughter 2: What about me?
Dad: Because, Daisy, when you were born, a daisy petal fell on your head.
Son: *walks in* Anso nai?!
Dad: Oh, hey, Brick.

Did you hear about the math teacher... ...who used a ladder to solve a calculus problem written at the very top of his blackboard?

He really rose to the equation.

A son asks his dad:"Dad, why is my sisters name Rose?" The dad answers: "Well it's because on our first date, I gave your mother roses, and she has loved them ever since."

Son: "Wow, thanks dad!"

Dad: "No problem, Bj."

“Dad, why is my sisters name Rose?” “Because your mom loves roses.”

“Thanks dad!”

“You’re welcome BJ.”

Axl Rose sat on a pin. Axl Rose.

Emily Rose sat on a pin Emily Rose.

I bought some rose-scented shampoo the other day.. ..it smells better than real poo.

A girl and her mom are in a car. Girl: "Why is my name Rose?"

Mom: "Your dad loves roses."

Girl: "Why is my brother named Robin?"

Mom: "Your dad loves the bird."

Girl: "Then why is my sister named Secretary?"

Mom: "That's why we are driving away from home."

what's better than 1 rose on a piano? 2 lips on an organ

What's better than a rose on your piano? Tulips on your organ.

So I was talking to my friend... So I was talking to my friend when I notice a big red bump on her nose. I ask her what happened and she replies...
"I stopped to smell a brose."
"Brose? There's no 'B' in rose."
"Well there was in that one!"

At a Chinese restaurant So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds". I said, Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck

What’s better than a rose on a piano? Two lips on an organ.

What’s the opposite of rose tinted glasses? Scepticals

Ian had a swollen nose One day Joe went to see his friend Ian, and noticed he had a big swollen nose.

“Whoa, what happened, lan?” he asked.

“I sniffed a brose,” Ian replied.

“What?” Joe said. “There’s no ‘b’ in rose!”

Ian replied, “There was in this one!”

"Hey Dad why is my sister's name Rose?" "Because your mother loved roses."

"Thanks Dad!"

"No problem Shitpost."

My wife laughed at me when I told her I was going to make a bicycle out of spaghetti You should’ve seen her face when I rose pasta on my new penne-farthing

Do you know what I like more than a rose on my piano? Tulips on my organ.

An ode to old ladies knickers. Rose's are red

Violet's are blue

Ethel's are green

"Dad, why is my sisters name Rose?" Dad: Because she loves roses.

Son: Thank's Dad.

Dad: No problem B.J.

While married to Rose, we acquired house, cars, jewelry, retirement accounts. And with the divorce, everything is coming up *ROSE's*!!

I have no idea how my first submission of this came to be flaired "Religion"... so I deleted it.

If Derrick Rose was a singer He would have more songs about being hurt then Taylor Swift

What did the Vietnamese rose say to the other Vietnamese rose? Me so thorny.

There were two sisters, Mary Rose and Mary Fridge Once Mary Rose asked: "Dad, why is my second name Rose?". And he answered "Because when you were born a rose fell on your head".
Mary Fridge comes and says "aaahhhsss uhhhhhh"

Jimmy Rose sat on a tack... Jimmy rose.