Hilarious Soda Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Soda Jokes

A woman was arrested for bringing her own popcorn, candy, and soda to the movie theater. She was fined and had to pay court fees, but the good news is she still came out a few bucks ahead from if she would have bought the popcorn at the theater.

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9 out of 10 doctors reccommend for children to drink water instead of soda that 1 doctor lives in flint michigan

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I dreamed I drowned in an ocean made of orange soda. When I woke I realized it was just a Fanta sea.

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Breaking News: A movie theatre has just been robbed of over two thousand dollars The theives took a large soda and two bags of popcorn

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Repost: 9/10 doctors recommend water over soda 1/10 doctors live in flint Michigan

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I always get sad when I crush my drink cans. It’s soda pressing.

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I used to have a job crushing cans. It was soda pressing.

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I used to have a job crushing cans in a soft drink factory all day. It was soda pressing.

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I had a job as a can crusher but I had to quit That job was just soda-pressing

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Working at the aluminum can recycling center is the saddest job I've had. It's just soda pressing.

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What's Pamela Andersons favorite soda? Hepsi!

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I got hit on the head with a can of soda yesterday. Lucky it was a soft drink

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What sort of scientists does Soda Stream employ? Fizzyscists

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I saw a Pepsi getting run over today It was soda- pressing

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I used to think an ocean of soda existed. Turns out it was just Fanta sea.

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Last night I dreamed the oceans were made of orange soda. But it was just a Fanta sea.

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Did you hear about the can of coke that got run over? It was soda pressing

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My Mom said to stop drinking soda because it has acid in it. I replied," Stop making such baseless accusations".

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A really sad man committed suicide by crushing himself with a vending machine He was soda pressed.

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Why does the can crusher hate his job? Because it's soda pressing.

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Nine out of ten doctors suggest you drink water instead of soda. The one that doesn't lives in Flint, Michigan.

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Why did the can crusher quit his job? Cuz it was soda pressing.

I'm so sorry everyone

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Tell me girl, do you like soda? Because I'd mount 'n do you. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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Why was the man who crushed recycled pop cans for a living sad with his life? Because his job was soda pressing.

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Boy, I just got hit in the head with a can of soda. I was lucky it was a soft drink.

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A movie theater was robbed of $150 worth of candy The thieves took 2 bags of M n' Ms and a small soda

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So someone threw a can of soda at me today. I'm alright though it was a soft drink.

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Why did the can crusher hate his job? Because it was soda pressing

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I got hit in the head with a can of soda. I am lucky that it was a soft drink.

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Which part of America can’t sell full-sized soft drinks? Minne-soda.

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I got hit on the head with a can of soda Luckily it was a soft drink.

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I had a job crushing cans once, but I hated it. It was soda pressing.

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How much soda does Kim Jung Un drink in a day? A Supreme Liter.

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Last night I dreamt that I was drinking orange soda... But the I woke up and realized that it was just a Fanta-sea.

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I hate going to aluminium recycling facilities Its soda-pressing.

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I hated my job at the recycling plant, I was in charge of crushing aluminum cans It was soda pressing

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A latino goes to a vending machine He gets a soda for 75c. He puts in 65c. The machine says "dime", so he whispers quiero una pepsi porfavor

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Thor and Loki enter a bar. Thor asks for two beers to start off and gets very drunk, but Loki only has water and soda the whole night. They get into a fight with each other. Even though Loki was sober, they both leave the bar hammered.

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In the 1990's, you could go into any store with just a dollar and get a soda, a bag of chips, and a candy bar. Now you can't. Why? Because there's cameras everywhere now

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New Soda Jokes

Dr pepper recruits future diabetes patients Soda speak

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Michael J Fox grabs a soda... His friend says: “You never drink those.”

Michael replies: “I just figured I’d shake things up”

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I had a dream about a sea of soda But, now that I remember it, it was a Fantasea

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Did you hear about the dude who got a desease from his soda he got cancer

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heard of the unhappy beverage? Yeah, he was soda upset :(

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You know what a Can-Crasher once said? This is "Soda" pressing.

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Why did the can squishier quit it’s job? Because it was soda pressing.

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Thor and Loki enter a bar. Thor asks for two beers to start himself off. Loki only has water and soda the whole night. They get into a fight. They both leave the bar hammered.

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If a killer whale wanted to compete with the Philharmonic, he'd just have to sip on a soda. Then he'd have a full orca straw.

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I've decided to get a PhD in how much soda you should have for the end of the world. Dr. Prepper, at your service.

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What's the offical soda of Texas? Big Red.

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I just signed up for the new college course about the effects of drinking soda on the body. Anatomy and fizzyology.

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The thing I hate about crushing cans It's soda depressing.

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Why was the balloon scared of having a soda? He didn't want to pop.

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Soda to the Head Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.

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I love the old times when I could buy so many candies, bottles of soda and fruit with just one dollar but now I can’t Because stores now have cameras

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I was hit in the head with a soda can... ...luckily, it was a soft drink.

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Did you hear about the ex body builder who can no longer crush a coke can? It's just soda pressing

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What do you call a carbonated beverage that tastes good, but not great? so-soda.

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A man got hit in the head with a can of soda. He's alright though, it was a soft drink.

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How did the flat can of coke feel? Soda pressed.

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Back in my day, you could walk into a convenience store with a nickel and get three licorice sticks and some soda. Now? CCTVs everywhere.

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I dreamed I was exercising my injured muscles in a huge reservoir of orange soda It was my fizzy-o-therapy fanta-sea.

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Why did the can crushes quit his job? Because it was soda-pressing.

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A grasshopper walks in to a bar... He orders a gin and soda. The bartender says,
"You know we have a drink named after you."
The grasshopper looks around and says,
"You have a drink named Irving?"

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I recently considered a career crushing cans for a living, but decided against it. That would be soda-pressing.

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Why did the soda-crusher quit his job? Cause it was soda pressing.

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Why couldn't the crumpled can of coke get out of bed in the morning? Because it was soda pressed.

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Today I was hit on the head with a can of soda. Luckily it was a soft drink.

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I quit my job as a can crusher ...it was just soda-pressing

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People who make soda jokes. People who make soda jokes must know a lot about pop culture.

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Why does no one drink soda in the jungle? There are only toucans.

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One hot day a thirsty couple went to get something to drink, there was lines for water and soda When they went to get punch, there was no punchline!

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My son wouldn't stop crying when he spilled the last Dr. Pepper on his feet. He was soda feeted.

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An Ewok walks into a bar.... and says to the bartender, “I’ll have a whisky and …… soda.”

The bartender says, “Sure thing—but why the little pause?”

“Dunno,” says the Ewok. “I’ve had them all my life.”

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Did you hear about the guy who got hit by a soda can? Lucky it was a soft drink.

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Did you hear about the guy who got hit by a soda? Luckily, it was a soft drink.

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Me: Do you want something to drink? Me: We've got this new soda called 'Princess Di.' It's a tribute to Princess Diana

Friend: Got anything else?

Me: Just Mountain Dew.

Friend: So those are my only two options?

Me: It's Dew or Di.

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What is a nymphomaniac's favorite soda? Mountain Dew

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I had a dream I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda I guess you could say it was a Fanta-sea

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Why did the can want to kill himself? He was soda pressed

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A latino goes to buy soda for 75 cents, he puts in 65 The machine reads "dime" so he gets closer and whispers "quiero Pepsi".

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whats a math teachers favorite soda root beer

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What do you call a phaser-flavored soda? Mountain D.E.W.

[Directed-Energy Weapon](#s)

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I feel like a plastic bottle in a Pepsi factory I'm soda pressed.

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What's a robot's favorite soda to drink? Mountain Dew LiveWire.

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Did you hear about that guy who died from crushing a Coke in a hydraulic press? It was soda-pressing.

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I dreamt I was swimming in orange soda turned out it was just a Fanta Sea

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Some say that beer is soda with soul... No wonder ginger ale isn't alcoholic!

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My friend works at a recycling centre crushing soft drink cans all day It's soda pressing

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My girlfriend said she wanted to experiment more in the bedroom... I don't know why she got so mad when I put my baking soda and vinegar volcano next to the nightstand.

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I like my soda like I like my women Flat and room temperature.

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I rather have a bottle of soda for President than Donald Trump. This way, we could truly have a Liter of the Free World.

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Just got a new Job at Coka Kola Engineering job, and man there is lots of high tech cola industry jargon being tossed around there, soda speak.

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A man is rocming a vending machine trying to get a soda for free Eventually the machines tips and falls on top if the man, cracking 6 of his ribs. Fortunately for the man, there were about 25 Dr.'s were already on the scene.

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People always ask me why I quit my job as a can crusher... Well it was just soda-pressing!

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I recently got a job at the recycling plant But it's soda pressing.

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What's a hooker's favorite soda? Mount and do

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What's a cat's least favorite soda? Barqs.

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I used to have a job involving crushing cans....... It was soda pressing!

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