Hilarious Teeth Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Teeth Jokes

Courtesy of my 6yo daughter: What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor

Score: 27688

My 7 year old nephew told this joke to my sister : what's the first thing you do after waking up and the last thing you do before going to bed? Nephew: Brushing your teeth!

Mom: oh honey that's not a joke.

Nephew: it is if you think that's what I do!

Score: 3591

What has 132 legs and 8 teeth? The front row of a Toby Keith concert.

Score: 2142

What has 72 legs and 26 teeth? The first row of a country concert.

Score: 954

My dentist mocked me today, saying that even though he's much older than me, he has healthier teeth. I said it must be because he has the better dentist.

Score: 915

Score: 569

Some people have 10 teeth, while others have 32 It's simple meth

Score: 539

A boy was sitting in a bus eating chocolate. The elderly man next to him asked him... Man : If you eat chocolates young lad, you will spoil your teeth.

Boy : My grandfather lived 110 years.

Man : By eating chocolate?

Boy : No. By minding his own business.

Score: 506

What has 50 pairs of eyes but only three teeth? The front row at a Trump rally.

Score: 473

Some people have 32 teeth. Others have 10. It's simple meth.

Score: 466

America is so racist and homophobic That people even want their teeth to be straight and white.

Score: 444

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear...
(From my daughter)

Score: 381

What do you get when 32 rednecks enter the same room? A full set of teeth.

Score: 326

What has 400 legs and 23 teeth? The front row of a Trump rally

Score: 253

You can tell the toothbrush was invented in Alabama if it was invented anywhere else, it would've been called the teeth brush.

Score: 250

What do you get when you put 20 Meth Heads in 1 room? A full set of teeth

Score: 237

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear. I'm so sorry..

Score: 224

Dentists are racist and homophobic. They want to make your teeth white and straight.

Score: 219

What's got no teeth and smells? The gearbox in the wife's car...

Score: 218

Turns out my co-worker and I are getting our teeth checked the same day Isn't that coinciDENTAL?

I'll see myself out

Score: 215

I once dated a dental hygienist She had the whitest teeth I ever came across.

Score: 203

You better start brushing your teeth, son! Oral-B very mad!

Score: 190

Some people have 32 teeth while others have 10... It's simple meth.

Score: 176

Why do men give their jackets to women when its cold? Because it hurts to get blown by chattering teeth

Score: 175

Why are no murders solved in West Virginia? Everyone has the same DNA and no one has any teeth.

Score: 173

Why does Donkey Kong brush his teeth? To prevent tooth DK.

Score: 160

What has 100 teeth and keeps Godzilla at bay? My zipper

Score: 145

I started flossing again recently to remove food from between my teeth I never realized just how much blood I was eating

Score: 139

One of my campers made this up today: What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

Score: 134

Did you know the toothbrush was invented in West Virginia? Anywhere else and it would have been called a teeth brush.

Score: 134

What dinosaur has the best teeth? A flossiraptor.

Score: 124

What has 200 legs and 40 teeth? The first row at a Trump rally.

Score: 105

Why is the South the best place to hide in case of zombie takeover? Southerner zombies don't have any teeth to bite with.

Score: 75

What is 20ft long and has 5 teeth? The funnel cake line at the Alabama state fair

Score: 75

Most people have 32 teeth, some only have 5... It's simple Meth really!

Score: 60

TIL the tooth brush was invented in Kentucky... Anywhere else and it would be called a teeth brush.

Score: 49

Why do social justice warriors hate dentists? Because they make teeth straight and white.

Score: 39

What has 60 legs and 8 teeth? The front row of a Country concert

Score: 33

What's 80 feet long and has 22 teeth? The front row of a Ted Nugent concert.

Score: 26

Hey girl, are you from Tennessee? Because your teeth are missing.

Score: 26

New Teeth Jokes

Why don’t ‘Woke’ people like good teeth? Because they’re straight and white.

Score: 2

What do you call a redhead who doesn't brush their teeth? Gingervitis

Score: 2

What has a mouth with teeth and flies? An Ethiopian child.

Score: 2

Today a woman told me that I have a beautiful smile and asked me what I use on my teeth. I looked at her and said "Polygrip".

Score: 4

A female friend of mine told me that i should act more like a knight So i stopped showering, brushing my teeth and i raped her

Score: 15

[Blonde] Why don’t Blondes use vibrators? The always chip their teeth.

Score: 8

Where's the only place that blonde girls can have dark hair? Between their teeth.

Score: 3

I went to the dentist with a dollar the other day. I got buck teeth.

Score: 2

I'm fortunate to have met a beautiful woman from Mississippi who had all of her teeth. All of them are on her necklace.

Score: 2

What’s red and bad for your teeth? The new Republican healthcare plan

Score: 2

People of Alabama have summer teeth. Summer there. Summer not.

Score: 3

Why does Antifa hate dentists? Because they make teeth straight and white.

Score: 4

What do you call the soft stuff in between a sharks teeth? A guy who couldn't swim fast enough

Score: 3

My Scottish friend doesn't take good care of his teeth He has ginger-vitis

Score: 4

I was abducted a few years ago. I was taken aboard a ship where they made me brush my teeth three times a day, wash behind my ears and eat all my greens I think I was on the mothership.

Score: 2

Why did the beached whale go to the dentist? He had shore teeth

Score: 2

What's something that's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Score: 6

Why did the chemist wear gloves to brush his teeth? His mouth was 4 molar

Post your favorite nerd chem jokes!

Score: 3

How do you know if a redneck is a gentleman? After he picks his teeth, he offers you the clean end of his toothpick.

Score: 2

An old lady went to visit her dentist When it was her turn she sat in the chair, lowered her underpants and raised her legs.

The dentist said, "Excuse me; I 'm not a gynecologist."

"I know," said the old lady "I want you to take my husband's teeth out."

Score: 2

What's 5 Feet long and has 7 teeth? He says he is a "Thark"

Score: 2

What has 100 eyes and 2 teeth? A bus full of old people..

What has 2 eyes and 100 teeth?

A crocodile

Score: 8

What to you call a room full of hillbillies? A full set of teeth

Score: 3

What do you have if you get 14 women from Missouri in a room? A full set of teeth.

Score: 5

What has a hundred teeth and holds back a monster? My zipper.

Score: 2

What is orange and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Score: 2

Why do protesters refuse to brush their teeth? Because plaque lives matter.

Score: 23

What do you call 32 British citizens? A full set of teeth.

Score: 21

I've been getting anonymous texts from someone telling me to shower, comb my hair & brush my teeth. I think they may be trying to groom me.

Score: 9

retired man joke There were two retired men. One of the men said
"I feel like a newborn baby,".
The other man asked why.
The man said, " I have no hair, no teeth, and I just peed in my pants.

Score: 1

My teeth started a movement... Plaque lives matter.

Score: 3

Why Donkey Kong always brushes his teeth? To prevent tooth DK.

Score: 23

Why does antifa hate the dentist? ...because they make teeth straight and white

Score: 1

I was detained at airport security, because the metal detector caught my braces... I guess you could say I was armed to the teeth.

Score: 1

A man runs into an old salty sea captain on the docks of Boston harbor and says, "Cap'm, can't help but noticin'...you got a steerin' wheel secures to yer crotch there." Sea captain removes the pipe from 'tween his teeth and says, "Aye. It's drivin' me nuts."

Score: 8

What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear.

Score: 1

When I bit into my sandwich, I broke my teeth Never ask your chemist friend to make you a PB & J.

Score: 5

What has 140 metal teeth and holds back the world's biggest monster? My zipper.

Score: 6

Hockey players are known for their summer teeth Summer here, summer there

Score: 3

What has 30 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Score: 13

What has forty legs and two teeth? A Klan rally.

Score: 7

What's red and bad for your teeth? Bricks

Score: 22

What's the difference between a redneck and a bonehead? 2 teeth

Score: 4

Human-beings get rich as they grow old: Silver in Hair;
Gold in Teeth;
Sugar in Blood;
Precious Stones in Kidney;
And a never ending supply of Gas!

Score: 24

A man walks into a barbershop and says, do you cut pubic hair? The Barber, a little taken back, says, "well, sure, why not?"

The man bares his teeth and says, "Great. Can you get this one?"

Score: 1

Q: What's red and really bad for your teeth? A: A brick.

Score: 10

What went through Hitler's mind when he killed himself? His teeth

Score: 2

Wal-Mart supercenters are going to be getting dental clinics to go with their pharmacies and vision centers.... There will actually be two clinics in each store---one regular clinic and an express clinic for people with ten teeth or less.

Score: 1

I recently switched over to cinnamon flavored toothpaste so when I do brush my teeth, I can't tell how much my gums are bleeding.

Score: 1

TIL the tooth brush was invented in Arkansas. If it was invented anywhere else it would have been called the teeth brush.

Score: 3

What do you call the soft tissue between a shark's teeth? The slow swimmer.

Score: 1

What do you call a Roman with hair between his teeth? a GladHeAteHer

Score: 4

An old woman goes to the dentist... ...takes off all her clothes and spreads her legs.
The dentist says "I think you have the wrong room..."
"You put in my husband's teeth last week", she replies. "Now you have to remove them."

Score: 8

What is simultaneously the best and worst thing one can hear at the dentist? These are the best looking teeth I've ever come across

Score: 3

Most people have 32 teeth, some have 10... It's simple meth.

Score: 4

When I was a kid, my grandfather told me his teeth are like the stars... ...they come out at night.

Score: 7

"Have you been for a check-up recently?" asked my dentist. "No. No I haven't," I answered.

"I can tell," he replied.

"Are my teeth bad?" I chuckled.

He said, "No, but I saw the wad of cash in your wallet."

Score: 11

What do you call 27 West Virginians? A full set of teeth.

Score: 3

What do you call the mushy red stuff between shark teeth? Slow swimmers

Score: 1

I don't understand why so many people in the south have bad teeth when they try their best to keep everything else straight and white.

Score: 1